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Question


Question Posted Friday December 16 2016, 2:21 pm

My fiance and I have been together for 12 years. We just had our first baby last year. But lately we have not been able to communicate our issues. So last night we got into a argument and it got so bad that he slapped the lamp that was on top of my nightstand and then it got physical. For the first time he had punched me in the side of my head while trying to hold me down... I always thought that things would change but it havent. Before he had only pushed me or slam me on the bed to "hold me down". After last night punched, I finally woke up and realized that he needs to go!! Have anyone gone through this? i should of left along time ago but i thought he would change, boy was I wrong!

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adviceman49 answered Saturday December 17 2016, 9:23 am:
A man should never touch a women in the manner you have stated. Throwing and holding you down on a bed is just as bad as hitting or punching you. It is domestic abuse which every state has some type of law against.

What I recommend is you take the baby and go someplace safe, your parents house if possible and then call the police to report his abuse of you. Do so now while the bruising is apparent.
File charges for assault and do not change your mind then ask the officer for information on how to get an order of protection.

An order of protection is a legal order from the courts requiring him to stay a certain distance from you and the baby. This also means he has to find some place else to live. If you live in a private home get the locks changed. If you live in an apartment ask to have the locks changed.

Monday morning you need to see a lawyer to have papers filed with the court giving you custody of the baby and making sure he pays child support and maintains health insurance on the baby.

You need to do these things for your own protection and the protection of the baby. Once an abuser always an abuser. You should have walked away the first time he laid hands on you and threw you down. It's not to late to walk away now. He will probably pleas with you to come back and promise never to touch you again. Don't listen to him. He will be good for a week maybe two or three then it will happen again and this time you may get hurt worse or he may hurt the baby. Make sure to get the order of protection.

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