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hopeful to get an answer by 5:00
I apologize, first and foremost, if this is in the wrong section. It has to do with work, but not exactly. So, hopefully, this question finds it's way to the right people who can answer it for me. My cats had kittens. As of then, they have been neutered and spayed and I found all of the kittens homes. I didn't make money off of them. I charged a small fee and then with that fee, I neutered and spayed my cats. The only request I had was for the people to keep in touch and send me pictures of the kittens, as I did grow to love them very much.
There was this one lady who got one of the kittens. She has a cat already and she was looking for a companion for hers. She was so kind and so nice that I thought it would be wonderful for her to have one. So, I homed one of the kittens with her. She even said that when she went out of town, I would be able to watch the cats for her, which I was thrilled about. Today, I'm suppose to head over to watch them for her. She lives about 45 minutes away from me. But, there were some things that I just didn't feel comfortable with.
Please keep in mind that I agreed to sitting the cats last week. A conversation happened yesterday, where she laid out certain requirements in which I just don't feel comfortable. But, at this point, I don't feel like I can say I'm no longer willing to do it, as she is leaving today. So, I would like to garner advice on ways that I can go about this appropriately, given the time constraints.
First, she told me that she wanted me to stay over at her place... like sleep there. I don't feel comfortable sleeping over at someone's house that I just met, even if there is nobody there. Secondly, I have my own pets to care for. Tomorrow, I have to work. I would much rather get a restful night's sleep in my own house and be closer distance to my job. These are cats, not children. They don't need to be supervised at every hour of the day, like you would a child. She also wants me to stay there the entire weekend. First and foremost, I work full time and I'm in graduate school. This weekend is a long weekend and I am very much looking forward to it because I need the rest. I think it's preposterous to assume that I need be there for the entire weekend. I'm happy to come in the morning, feed everyone, play with them, maybe stay for a few hours and watch TV, read a book. But, I would like to go home at the end of the day and tend to my responsibilities. I would like to be able to leave in the late afternoon. I live alone. No one does my laundry and no one cleans my house. I'm happy to help others, but helping others shouldn't be at the expense of abandoning my responsibilities either.
She then told me that if I wanted to have anyone over, like my mom or a boyfriend, that she would have to meet them first because she didn't want anyone in her house that she doesn't know. I completely understand that and she is within her right to make those requests. But, I am also in my right to feel a little bit uncomfortable with that. I can understand not wanting someone to throw a party in their place... but MY MOM? Not that it's absolutely essential for me to take my mom but it just seems kind of weird. Like I said, it's in her right, as it is her place. But, it kind of makes me feel like she could be hiding something. I never said I was going to bring anyone. She just randomly said that. It's kind of like getting a text message from someone that says "come alone." Obviously, you're going to feel some apprehension about it... like, what's so secretive? I understand her position, but put yourself in my shoes for a moment. Your going to a house that you've never been to, meeting a person that you've only met once. And she specifically requests that you don't bring anyone... not even your mom? And then requiring that you sleep there.. alone? You can see where I feel a little bit strange.
She seems like a really great and nice lady. I doubt that she truly has something up her sleeve. But, you never know nowadays. I'm kind of uncomfortable with the whole situation. But, at this point, it would seem really unfair to back out and I genuinely fear there won't be anyone to take care of the furry friends. Would you please advise me on the best... and possibly the most professional way to go about this?
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Did she ask you just yesterday to watch the cats for the weekend? If she sprung it on you the last minute, then its entirely in your rights to tell her that since you two hadn't had the chance to discuss details ahead of time its imperative at this moment because due to your own commitments, you can only look in on her cats to feed them and change litter box and then leave again. That you are unable to stay the whole time. If again this is last minute on her part, and she gets angry, its not your fault.
Now if she asked you days ago or weeks ago, or longer, it was at that time or sometime other than the day of or day before she needed you that details should have been discussed very well. Heck even my ex when needing the dog and cats looked after asked if I would be able to stay the whole weekend and the only issue was that my really new boyfriend, now my husband was supposed to visit me that weekend so I asked if it was okay with him if I invited my friend over and he said it was okay. If a pet is taking medication at the time as was the deal when I watched my daughters cat at my place when she was gone, things like that, and how often the pet needs to be fed and how much and any issues the pets may have, scared of loud noises, etc. should be divulged ahead of time, not on the last minute when the owner may forget something crucial.
Its strange that she believes you do nothing all day and night and have the free time to just sit in her house all weekend. Maybe she's extremely naive, or inconsiderate. If you can't call at once to discuss what you can and cant do and see if she's willing to accept your terms, then she
needs some time to quickly find someone else who will sleep at her house for the whole weekend.
I agree that cats don't need constant watching. ITs a different story with dogs needing to go out to do their business and needing the social interaction more. Never feel bad about saying no to someone if all the situation doesn't sit right with you.
I hope you learned something for the next time in life when you vaguely offer to do someone a favor in the future and one day they hit you up on it. When that happens, remember to get as many details as possible to see if you are still willing to help out. An offer made to help for future, unless a specific date and place and time and other stuff are nailed down right then, it is not a promise that you will for sure do it, its just an offer. In this case, sounds like you accepted the chance to care for the cats as a way to see one of the kittens again and you werent thinking that she might have terms of her own and you also did not think to share with her your terms and obligations that make it impossible to stay at her place 24 hrs a day. So you need to call her ASAP and tell her so and your only excuse for why you didn't say anything when she gave you the list of expectations is that you were too surprised and thinking perhaps you could get out of your obligations to think straight and just turn her down at the time. As it stands, here is what you can offer and are still willing to do. Ask if its okay with her and if not, then you will be unable to watch her cats.
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