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Suicidal what do I do
I've been deppresed for about 2 years now, and I'm struggling to cope with it anymore. I've already attempted suicide once, but I just ended up waking up in my bed. It's just been getting worse because of the fact I'm failing almost every class in 9th grade because I have no motavation, one of my freinds said something extremly mean, and now I really want to die.
I've tryed the suicide hotline but that didn't work, and I know even if I get help I most likely won't be able to take anti deppresents because my mom had bipolar disorder genes and when she took an anti deppresents she became bi-polor.
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First and most important, YOU ARE NOT YOUR MOTHER, just because she became bipolar does not mean you will. There are many more drugs today to treat depression especially the most common form of depression which is probably what you are suffering.
You need to get help now especially if you are actively suicidal. TO get help just pick up the phone and dial 911. Tell the call taker you are feeling suicidal and help will be sent to you. The call taker will stay on the phone with you until help arrives. The help that is sent is the closest fire truck, ambulance and police car. Given your age the police officer is there to see to it that the paramedic on the ambulance is allowed to examine you and that a parent doesn't interfere.
There is another hotline you might want to try It is the kids help phone 1-800-668-6868. This group is specially designed to help teenagers with problems they have. To call this number you must be under the age of 20.
To deal with your depression I suggest you contact a Board Certified Psychiatrist. This is a medical doctor who has done a fellowship in psychiatry and is certified by the college of psychiatrists to practice psychiatry. This doctor is the best doctor to recommend diagnose your problem and give you medication if needed. The doctor will then recommend talk therapy with a psychologist to get at the root cause of your problem.
I have suffered with depression and I have been cured by working with these two types of doctors. When you meet with the psychiatrist tell the doctor about your mom and your concern of bipolar. It is Important that the doctor know of your family history but it does not mean you will be come bipolar.
IF you don't know a psychiatrist call your local hospital patient referral line. Ask for a referral to a Board Certified Psychiatrist.
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Please try the suicide hot line again. You don't get the same person every time. Maybe the next one will be more helpful. I'm sorry your friend was mean to you. Perhaps he/she is not a good person to have as a friend. Never base your opinion of yourself on the comments of others. Opinions are like a-holes, everyone's got one and most of them stink. Lol
Seriously though, I understand that you are scared of medication but you are not your mom. There are many different types of help you can get from talking to a counselor to finding the things in the world that give you joy and focusing on them. Please don't give up. Life gets so much easier after high school.
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