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I want to move but my husband says no
I want to move but my husband doesn't. We've been living with my grandmother for over 2 years now. Shes elderly and needs some care. We have two children, age 11 and 18 months old. My oldest son has his own room but the baby doesn't. My grandmother has another piece of land connected to hers and told us we could have it. I want to buy a mobile home and put on it and my husband doesn't. He says hes worried about paying the bills but I think we can afford it. I really need to get out of this room we live in and have my own place, not just for me but for my kids and our dog. (Basically we're all forced to live in a very small room) I feel like every time I try to bring it up he just cuts me off and we start arguing. He has a job and a decent credit score. I don't. I'm a stay at home mom with very little income on my own. I can not get anything without his signature. We would still be close enough to my grandma that I could check in on her and another plus we wouldn't be paying rent! If we move somewhere away from here, which is most likely the ONLY way he will agree to move, then we will be paying out even more a month in rent. The place Im interested in purchasing the mobile home gave me an estimate of $150 a month. We cant find rent that cheap. I don't know how to convince him to move or if I should just give up. I need someone to give me advice. Thanks
I also want to add: We are 30 years old, been together for 10 years, and Ive been looking into a mobile home for over a year. Other places have asked those questions. I also have a monthly income MYSELF, excluding my husband of $300. Its not a lot, but its enough to help pay our bills.
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I am completely with adviceman on this one. I think you should also try to get him to sit down with you and tell you what is coming in right now and the WHOLE cost of the monthly bills and sit there and write it all down WITH him while hes sitting there infront of you.
This will show him that your willing to do what it takes to make SURE that if there is a chance of making this realistically work that your willing to put in the leg work and figure out HOW (in his mind at least) its not doable.
Get him to tell you so that you can work out the finances right there and there first, THEN tell him that youve been making some calls and based on what HE told you money wise that it could or could not be doable.
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One thing to bring up to your husband is that owning the mobile home has some equity built into it if you keep it in good repair especially if it is a double wide factory built home and not a trailer. There is no equity in paying rent unless your grandmother has willed her home to you. In which case you may have to get a mortgage to pay any estate tax or capital gains caused by receiving the house. Those taxes would be offset by any loss you would have in the sale of your mobile home if you any.
It also appears your $300 monthly income would pay the mortgage, the required insurances and the utilities for the mobile home. You would recoup the money going for rent to your grandmother in whatever amount that is. It has to be close to even. So you lose nothing and gain the freedom of having your own space and still being close to your grandmother if she needs you.
To my mind if you grandmother really needed you as a caretaker she would not be asking you for rent but paying you for being her caretaker. At the very least just asking you to live with her rent free in exchange for being her caretaker.
What I'm saying is approach your husband logically with the facts and figures. Use a spreadsheet if you need to. The estimated monthly cost of the mobile home mortgage is $150 a month. Call the Electric & Water companies and ask then for and estimated monthly cost for their services based on a family of four in your model mobile home. You will probably cook and heat with propane call a propane supplier and get estimates. You will also need a cost for the required insurance which would be fire and disaster insurance in the amount of the replacement cost. You should have insurance on your belongings but that is optional.
Once you have the numbers than work the numbers against what you are paying in rent. What it will cost you should you inherit your grandmother's house. You will most likely have to get a mortgage to pay the taxes on the inheritance and that mortgage is going to be higher than the one for the mobile home.
Having a place of your own now gives you options in the future. This is the logic of what I suggest you present to your husband rather than just ask him to buy something he may feel is not necessary.
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