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Advice on a first relationship?
Hi, I'm Katherine and I'm 14. I'm a month into my first ever relasonship with this awesome guy...and it's super awkward. Honestly, it's just composed of us smiling at each other when we're hanging out at school because we never know what to say, saying "hi" in the halls, and, rarely, texting for about 15 minutes.
I'm kind of scared he might end it. I mean, we've held hands once, and I was fine with it but he seemed uncomfortable. does that mean anything? How can I prevent things from being so awkward? Please answer and I hope you have a good day :)
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hi Katherine, let me say that what you are experiencing is all very normal. This relationship is all new to you and possibly to him as well though you have both been in relationships before without realizing it.
When you were younger and you made friends to play with, that was a relationship. It is part of the building blocks we use as we grow and mature. You’re now a teenager and the next level of relationships and maturity is taking place; this all a learning experience.
Just as you learned to choose your friends you will learn, through trial and error, how to choose boys and men, to enter into a relationship with. There will always be an awkward stage to any new relationship while you explore each other like's and dislike and what things you may have in common.
You’re in school now, possibly in the same grade. It doesn't sound like you share any classes but you may have the same teachers. This could be a starting point for conversations between you. You could ask him who his teachers are. Maybe you and he share the same teacher for a subject at different times. You could ask him what he thinks of that teacher. This is something you have in common.
Another conversation started for something at school would be the school lunch. You could ask him if he had the cafeteria lunch today. If he said he did then you could offer your comments on it or if he said yea it was horrible. That's a conversation starter.
In order for a relationship to grow and prosper you two must have things in common to talk about. As I tell older people. Romance is not everything. There comes a time when you wake up and find you have nothing in common and nothing to talk about. That's when the romance dies.
Talk to him; question him about likes and dislike. This is how you learn about whether someone is worth putting the effort into a relationship by vetting him to see if you compatible.
By the way sex does not make a relationship compatible. Do not ever give a boy or a man sex if he says something like; "If you love me you will have se with me." The guy that uses a line like this is not in love with you. He lusts for you and young guys will confuse love and lust believing they are one in the same.
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