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SSI Benefits
26 female
I have been recieving SSI and survivors benefits off my Dad since I was12 and my mom is my payee which means she is the one who helps me budget my money. She use to be really good abou giving me my money with no problems but now she is not wanting to give me hardly anything. She went from giving me $60.00 a week and then she decreased it to $20.00 a week and I have to buy everything I need with that ecept she bought me a carton of cigarettes and is only giving me 3packs3my a week. I live with my cousin and my cousin is basically buying everything I need out if her own money when I run out of things I need when I run out of money. I want to change my payee my problem is my mom would get mad if she finfs out and I dont know how to change my payee.
Can I make the decision to change my payee without
my momknowledge or permission with the diagnosis of mental retardation with the IQ of 69?
I have other issues with my mom that bother me like I never know when my phone bill is going to get paid. She tells everyone even complete strangers that i am mr. She also brings up things that I dont remember when she gets mad like the fact that I was molested by mad when I was 3. She always put me down . I have heard all my life that I will never be able to do this or She days that I can't do this because I have the mind of a child. She gas mentioned that she wants to jave me declared mentally encompentant and if she does that I will no rights if she sees to it. What should I do?
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I used to be a part time caregiver for a gal in your position, who was getting assistance in housing and a monthly SSI check. She had a state assigned case worker to make sure all was the same, and nothing changed on a yearly basis and I as someone who spent time helping her, had to be present to give a report too. She was perfectly capable of deciding to look for and find other low income housing and get on a waiting list with the country for a new place when reg. apts rent went up. Parents are responsible for their children until they turn 18, and having m r is not an excuse for a parent to continue to have control of funds meant to care for you. It should now be going to someone else whom you have chosen and want to be your payee. I had a male client with schizophrenia at one point decide he wanted to change his payee and he also decided to no longer use the agency that sent me out and ask a distant relative who was willing, to be a caregiver. People in your position have those rights.
So yes, you need to talk to a lawyer. And of course Mom will be angry when she no longer receives your checks because she has been abusing the system for a long time and is relying on this as extra income for her to spend on herself and pay her own bills with. She needs to find other income. She has been doing something illegal basically as there are rules that go along with the paying or any provisions that come from government agencies. Even food stamps program have rules. no one else can use your card for food, only you or it is a crime if someone else receives food off it that was meant for you. I have food stamps, I know. So I know it would apply as well to your SSI check. It doesnt matter what your IQ is or whether you are mentally challenged in any way, those funds are meant strictly for you and you get to make the choice. So dont believe Mom. Perhaps have cousin help if you need it, to start making calls and discover who your state caseworker is and request to talk to her. You do have one or as Adviceman said, you wouldn't be getting funding otherwise. The survivor benefits is one thing, but SSI entirely another. Your mom is trying to scare you into not asking around and trying to get help by threatening to declare you mentally incompetent. You wouldn't even be writing to us and with such clarity if you were so totally unable of doing lots of the basics of self care. ANd you probably may qualify for some caregiving if you had your own place. So dont be scared into doing nothing. No one will listen to any threats of your mom's without any real good testing and verification and meetings with you. Good luck. I would like to hear how this turns out for you. Dont delay but try to get a hold of a lawyer or at least check with social services and get a private meeting with your social worker at your cousins, without Mom around if possible so you can share your concerns. You also have your cousin who can verify that you only receive some funds from your Mom. That alone will start an investigation as to what your mom has been doing with the money and she may be required to pay it all back. Or at the very least, the SSI check will stop going to her immediately and you could choose who gets your check if not going to yourself.
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With an IQ of 69 I suspect that you may be receiving other benefits such as welfare benefits for housing, food and Medicaid for doctors’ visits. To receive these benefits you would have a case worker. These benefits are yours to be used to use to keep you safe, fed and pay your bills. They are not to be used by your mother for her benefit.
You write as if you have a good understanding of what is going on. A low IQ does not mean you are not smart enough to care for yourself in many ways. You might need assistance with certain things such as money management though that person does not have to be your mother.
What I suggest is you contact a lawyer and ask for the lawyers’ assistance in finding out just what you are receiving in the way of benefits other than SSI. If your mom is the payee on these benefits and cannot prove she is spending those funds on you then she will have to pay them back so they can be given to you. Since you do not live with her if you are receiving money for food and housing she would have to prove she is giving this money to your cousins who would have to report it on their taxes and take you as a dependent.
Taxes are a whole other problem. Living with your cousin and having them be responsible for more than half of you needs make you their dependent. IF they and mom are taking you as a dependent then mom is cheating on her taxes which are serious.
I suggest you contact legal aid and ask a lawyer for help. The lawyer will find out just what help you are receiving and where it is going. The lawyer can also help you with assigning a new payee for your SSI. There are alternatives to a relative being a payee. The lawyer can also help you find out what other services you are entitled to and help you apply for them.
From what and how you have written to us I think it is possible you could live in a supervised group home rather than with a relative. It is also possible for you to have a job with such organizations as Point of Lights, The Salvation Army or Goodwill.
If you’re capable of living in a group home and holding a job mom will not be able to have you declared mentally incompetent. You were able to find us on the web. Use a search engine and type in "Legal aid (put the name of your state here without the prentices). Then look for the 24 hour help line and contact them.
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