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For our Debate
I just want your opinion.
Who are to blame for child deliquency The Parent or The Government??
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I agree with adviceman. I have an analogy that might help make the answer clearer for you. When you purchase a new microwave, computer, i-phone, car, etc... they come with an owners manual on how to use it and a section for troubleshooting. When a couple add a child to their life, it does not come with an instruction manual describing how best to raise it and how to train it, how to take care of issues and bad behavior. Not only that, but no two kids are alike, so what may have worked with the first kid is not going to work with the next. Using the house hold items or car again as example, if something isn't working right, there are issues, do you call on government agencies to help tell you how to care for your computer or car properly? It never has been and never will be the job of the police department or your local state rep or DSHS to instruct you on how to use and care for your car for example. So why would parents turn to the government for instructions? Some parents have a natural instinct on what to do, most do not. So think about it, how does anybody learn something new? There's different learning styles but most learn from hearing and being instructed or being shown how and then given chances to do it on their own. Thats how you learned to tie your shoes, or feed yourself, etc...from observing your parents. Parents have for too long decided not to parent their child or feel they dont have the time with both working full time or 2 jobs so kids are left to raise themselves in some cases. Thats like expecting your car to take itself for an oil change regularly and put gas in its own tank without you doing it for the car.Kinda dumb, sounding huh? But thats what many parents do. I dont know how to raise the child so I will do nothing and so by default, it falls to the government to have to step in and set guidelines and laws, some laws that in fact take away parents rights on how to raise their kids. It often can create a bigger problem when government attempts to 'control' the raising of children something they were never meant to do. It has always been the role of the parents and the new parents learned from asking their parents, (the kids grandparents) or getting idea's from other parents, friends and neighbors. It was the parents and community who raised the kids, not the government. As I said, each child can be different. I had 3 girls. The first two were easy, the 3rd was a struggle in that from an early age, 2 and on, it became apparent that she didn't like to be told what to do, she wanted to be able to make ALL decisions on her own, like an adult but no kids at age 2, 6, or 9 can even fully comprehend all the angles to a situation and know how to make good decisions on their own. I didnt give up but it was hard. then one day, a women about 10 years older who had my daughter in her sunday school class around age 4,5 approached me and told me she loved having my daughter in class and she reminded her of her own daughters personality. She then described her daughter to me and it was the same as mine. She then asked if I would like any ideas and help on how to handle her. I said yes, being very grateful. Most parents today are insulted or upset if anyone attempts to help with advice when thats the exact thing needed. I was told to give her choice because thats ultimately what she wants. I need to be okay with any of the choices I give her but the thing I don't want her to do is also a choice she can make, but let her know what negative consequences come with it, like no dessert, going to bed early or sent to her room, no TV, etc... and the options she can make that I'm okay with have positive consequences. Its rare that little kids so stubbornly and tenaciously will hang in there trying to make their own decisions and giving you hell if you dont let them. So I tried this method, not sure tho that a child so young could understand the consequences part. But every single time, without fail, when given the enticing choice and the not so good choices, she always chose the right path. We dont give kids the credit due. If we explain things at a level that they can understand, and give each child exactly what they need, they are so intelligent and will make the right choices. Kids need to feel loved and wanted not abused and neglected and that also contributes to issues. However the family unit is supposed to be the first place they learn about love and caring for others and respect for others etc... all in the family unit. When the family unit falls apart, it fall
s to government who makes an even poorer example of how to be a good citizen because they are not the childs parents, grandparents, aunts uncles, family friends or next door neighbor.
I can honestly say this, if not for that church member mom who gave me helpful advice on how to handle my own daughters unique personality, I can't say how she might have turned out, I could easily have had a delinquent child in her, even though I was a loving attentive parent and did fine with the first two.
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Both. Parents do not parent the way they should they rely too much on others to parent for them. This is true of both the affluent and the poor.
The government also is at fault for placing too much emphasis on issues that do not is not the government's responsibility. An example is the recent case of the government intervening in how some parents allow their children to walk unaccompanied to a park about a mile from their home. They called this child endangerment. Yet children of the same age are allowed to walk the same distance to school.
Children no longer play by themselves everything has to be arranged for them and supervised such as play dates. If not the parents could be in trouble with the law for not supervising their children. When I was young, during the summer and on non school days when the weather was nice you had your breakfast and you were sent outside to play. You came home for lunch and you went back outside until dinner.
No one supervised us. We went to the school yard or a corner lot and played ball. We rode our bikes. We built forts in the back yards and played Army. If you did something wrong any of your friends parent on the block could punish you.
No one called the police for minor infraction or even major ones. If we broke a window for by playing ball where we should not have been. Our parents pooled their funds to pay for the repair. We were given chores to do to pay for the funds our parents paid to fix the window. Simple crime and punishment adjudicated on the spot by the parents. No judges no police officers; parents parented their children.
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