|
its bad to say but i kinda hate my family
Hello.. :) I hope you can give me some advice.. I love my dad and im daddy's girl but in past years he started drinking a lot after work and coming home early so when he's home mum and he fights a lot and it gets me bc i love then and i dont want them to tear apart.. My mum works in hospital so when she finishes work she's just laying in her bad and cant do anything bc she's tired so there's one more reason for fight.So our grandma cooks and everything but gives money and all support to her dother not son(my dad) i dont know why. She bought her house,pays her bills talks on phone with her all the time and her daughters but claims she loves me the most and my brother always blame me for everything and ist always my fault. I dont know what to do i feel lke im lonely with noone.Im a good student and always witha smile on my face in school so people think i live great life but when i come home its basiclly a hell..
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
It sounds a lot to me like it's your dad's drinking that is putting your, brother and mum under pressure. It'll put a strain on finances as well as relationships, and this will increase the pressure still further on your mum. It's quite easy to become addicted to alcohol. Soon you begin to drink it not to feel good or drunk, you need to drink it to feel normal. And until you've had a drink it can be hard to function at all. None of this is your fault of course, but you are caught up in all the crossfire and it's no wonder you feel alone and a victim. School will certainly be a relief from an environment like this. Do try hard to keep up the image and work hard. Ultimately it is to your best advantage to get a sound education. And for now it will be something solid and less stressful and explosive as home life. It's good to keep something solid and dependable to hold on to. I'm afraid that because the atmosphere is caused by the drinking, and you are NOT the cause of it then you can't directly be the solution either. I would suggest you try and find some time to speak to mum, and your grandma. Somehow you need to work together to get through to dad to get him to take steps to stop drinking. Alcohol addiction ruins relationships, and lives and the health of the drinker too. Unfortunately, as much as you love your dad it is perhaps unlikely that appealing to him to stop because you love him will be enough. But tell him anyway. Often. There are organisations (Alcoholics Anonymous for instance) who can really help if he can be made to see that he has a problem which is not likely to go away and can be all but impossible to resolve without this sort of professional help. We all emotionally and verbally lash-out at those we love when the whole house is under pressure like this. Hence the constant arguments and recriminations and placing of blame. There are ways back to a happy and secure family life and many, many people have been in this position. It's not a case of it being an unavoidable unhappy end by any means. Dad is a victim here, not the big bad ogre, even if it mght appear so. It's the drink that's the enemy. He'll need a lot of help and support. Have that chat with mum and grandma soon as you can. You can't just hope it will all go away, but that's often the state of my mind we can slip into. Make the start and the rest will follow.
]
More Questions: |