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The events that took place earlier today
So long story short today I got into a fight with the guy that we will refer as Ryan to protect his name. I was so mad at him for a personal reason and I got my friends to try to talk to him and he said to one of my friends : “Tell Tyler to stop using his child friends to talk to me. That’s the shit that pisses me off.” I texted him and responded and said ” What the fuck ever dude. I’m tired of this shit. I’ll see you at camp (since he got a job at the camp that I go to), not as a friend, as an instructor.” What he said was what I deserved just to make that clear. I then proceeded to freak out and I grabbed a knife and cut my legs with brutal force and all of my friends in the process were freaking out because of what I was doing. I then told him how I was doing such a thing and he literally flipped out and told me that he did not want me to die and stayed on the phone with me until I regained consciousness and told me that he knew that I could push through the other things that led to me doing so to my legs because some of the other triggers were awful. I then regained consciousness and cleaned up the blood and patched up my legs and then I apologized for being such an asshole to him and we then proceeded to talk and then he went out to do something and he isn’t even in town at the moment. Also while I wasn’t awake he kept texting me to stop and I cant really describe what else he said because it was so thoughtful to say when his friend which is me was slowly dying.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
You need to seek mental help for your self-harming behaviours.
I'm not even clear, from your question, what it is this guy did that upset you so much in the first place. What I do know, is that NOTHING a guy does should ever lead you to hurt yourself like that!
Talk to a trusted adult about what happened. If not your parents, then a teacher, or a coach, or a neighbour. Someone. Ask for counselling and support. Don't stab yourself just to get a boy to be nice to you! That's not sensible or heathy.
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