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20 year old and 15 year old?
Hey, I'm 15 and a freshman . Well, this guy (he's 20 and he graduated already) have been friends since last summer and him and I are somewhat really close. He's a really sweet guy, he is a Christian and he's never had sex before. He's helped me through when I got dumped, rejected, bullied, depressed, and we've just always been real good friends and never fight. Well, since Valentine's Day is coming up we already made plans to hang with our single friends, and yesterday he asked me if I would go out with him, and I keep saying I'll think about it, but I just don't know how I should respond even though I feel the same way as him. Like, we discussed age gap we had and he said 5 years isn't that huge and I kind of agreed. If him and I go out, I just would feel afraid I would get bullied for it , but I don't know. I want to say yes, but a part of me wants to say no. Advice please?
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I think that 5 years is huger when you're 15 and he's 20. Things get better when you're 20 and he's 25. Right now at this point in your life, the two of you still want different things.
I doubt very strongly that the two of you are doing similar things with your lives right now, or are thinking of the same things. In order for a relationship to work, especially when you're starting out, the two of you have to be in relatively the same place.
Is not having sex something that he has chosen not to do because of religion? Or, does he want to find the right girl to do it with first? I'm not sure what state you live, but if the two you were to have sex, that would be illegal. He could go to jail.
For now the two of you should remain friends. If you still have feelings for each other after you graduate high school, then maybe revisit the issue later.
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well im gonna be honest with you here, my husband is SEVEN years older then me and we met when i was 13 and he was 20. We were friends for a year and we both knew how we felt about each other and it just felt RIGHT. REALLY RIGHT. We were determined to be together no matter what anyone else said.
We made sure that our parents met and talked and were ok with it, and we've been together ever since. We're now married (six years) and have a three year old son. we also WERE intimate even though in the state of cali it would have been illegal if my mom felt it wasnt ok.
So you see these types of relationships CAN work i just wanna say that before i start in on anything else here. Secondly, i had always been considered MUCH more mature for my age, hated boys my OWN age, thought they were stupid, and liked older guys i could have REAL conversations with (and even then the immature older ones got filtered out by me REAL quick)
In the long run if both of you are similar people, your goals in life are the same, and you want to reach those goals TOGETHER whatever it takes, then it can work. Really its not always the age that matters, its the priorities each other have, and maturity levels and how badly you both want things to work.
If anyone is bullying you over being with an older mature guy, its probably just because their jealous. Alot of people spend their lives comparing theirs to yours, we all do it to a degree, its a human thing but when they start to treat you badly instead of just being happy for you then thats when its time to push them away.
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Mind the gap? If you want this boy a lot, then you wouldn't mind the bullying and you wouldn't mind the gap.
The difference between really liking him and having feelings for him is that you SHOULD NOT care what others tell you about your relationship (if you chose to be with him). If not, then you will remain friends and you will be sacrificing the chance to be with him romantically.
He obviously likes you and you obviously like him, depending on what state you are in or where you live, by law, it can be illegal because he is considered an adult and you are a child.
Be careful. Do respond.
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