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My friend is mad for a silly little thing
So during resess, my friend n, not real name, but I won't actually name him, was mad at my other friend,p, again not the real name. So I was joking around and said "Oh punch her in the face," and I started laughing at my joke. P is like "if your a real friend then you wounding have said. So many your not my friend at all." The rest of the day she gives me the silent treatment and I say sorry a million ways and compliment her. She hates my guts! And I'm thinking P be mature cause we play a game we are both out and I'm on one side and she moves to the other. Can u at least pretend and she tells everyone I said to N to hit her. girl get a joke because last year she kicked my head and punched me when I was on the floor.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Often the best move is not to label someone else's frustration as a silly little thing. Think of times someone belittled your anger in that way, it invalidates your feelings. Friends assume their friends feelings are legitimate, try to see it from her side and let her know you're working on that, even if you don't ultimately agree, you can say you're trying your best to understand her point of view and that you want to act in a way that makes her feel respected. Good luck!
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Friends don't kick and punch each other. Kids may do that to classmates they associate with but a true friend no... and neither do they joke about it. My guess is that if both of you find something you like about each other, then you first need to learn how to be a friend, to get a friend. This one should be easy but when we are young, we really don't know how and instead of asking to learn how, we just react with the first thought that comes to mind, act without a real clue.
If it was me you said that to, I may not be mad but feel it's in my best interest to avoid you as it makes me feel not liked or really cared about. Lets put it this way, she or someone else made the same comment regarding you to another person, and then laughed about it, would you be laughing and finding it extremely funny? I doubt it. Because negative words, stunts or actions do hurt, whether from a so called friend or stranger.
I doubt that you have bizarre sense of humor or you would laugh if I said something nasty and degrading about you right now.
If you don't like being treated a certain way, neither will anyone else in your world. All of us want love and acceptance and people who understand and support us. I'm not saying she's without fault for her earlier actions but in our growing up years we need to learn to forgive and forget and not bring up our past mistakes and we learn and grow and mature. WHAT counts is what you do with today with the relationship, not the past. In time, my guess is she will cool off and get over it. But ridiculing someone for being upset and taking it seriously, or the wrong way is only going to make things worse. Give her as much time as she needs to get over it. sTop constantly getting in her face and apologizing as that also brings back the memory. Be careful in the future as to what you say to others, as once spoken, your words can't be 'taken back' or erased, it will be in her memory for life. so unless she develops amnesia, she'll always remember. As to how she feels about it after some time as gone by, who can know. You just may never get her back as an acquaintance you hang with or a friend.
Also, beware of girls when entering puberty can find the hormones mess with their emotions, you and she may or may not be there yet. But this is a heads up, cus few ever realize that hormones can affect friendship. It can make a girl easily irritated, angry, upset...for no reason at all, even if you know you've been on good behavior. What we do is tend to lash out at another female in our lives. It can be friends, sisters or mom. It helps if you can keep in mind that it is the hormones and not the person choosing purposed to act that way. If it happens, the person has no choice, sometimes they are extremely sad or weepy for no reason TOO. I hope this encourages you to try harder to be a good friend and learn how to place yourself in another persons shoes, which means thinking how you'd feel if you were in the other persons place. I still use that as an adult and it has helped me to put up with cranky adults with stress and issues in their life as they may say or act in a way towards me that I find negative. If I were in their spot, I'd feel that way too. Maybe as I'm more mature as an adult I wouldnt act out the same way, but understanding what drives them to it, helps me to not take things personally.THIS is a good thing to learn dear.
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