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I love my boyfriend but I don't know what to do
Ive been with my boyfriend for several months now. He's in his mid 20's I just turned 30. I love him to pieces and I know he loves me. Our communication is good and honesty is there. But we hardly see each other because of work schedules. And he doesn't have a car right now. So we see each other very little,and I have to go to him. I don't want to break up but its tough not seeing him but a few hours a week and usually its from 11 pm to 11 am and we've both worked all day so we are tired and fall asleep. Advice?
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I'm not sure how to respond to this question for I'm not sure what you are asking. The previous two answers go to different ends of what you might be asking.
Are you questioning this relationship because you see very little of each other and when you do there is little to no romance?
Are you asking for ways to see each other more often and how to spice up your romance?
While I believe age is just a number there is one question I have when party is as young as your boyfriend is. How does he see you. Young men his age still have the problem most teenage men have defining love. Many still define love as more towards lust.
So if you're questioning the relationship the first thing I believe you need to answer is how he sees you. Does he see you as just a lover, a bigger sister, a cougar or someone to mother him? Sorry if that hurt but I tend to call a spade a spade.
Once you answer that question you will know what direction to take this relationship in if any.
If you're asking how to spice up your lives you have to first clarify what you have by answering the first question. When my wife and I first started dating we were on opposite work schedules and at first did not even have the same days off. We managed to see each other by dating around our schedules and on the days we both worked I would stop at her apartment on the way home. We had time to make love if we wanted and to have breakfast before I drove her to work. Eventually we knew we had something special and were both able to change our schedules so we had more time together.
Since we worked for competing airlines still our supervisors knew us both and were lenient enough to allow us to have extra days off to travel on buddy passes to different places. They even arranged some very nice perks when we got around to taking a Honeymoon. We did the Disneyland Knottsberry Farm thing.
What I am saying is if you both love each other equally and want this relationship to work you can find ways to make it work just as my wife and I did. It really all starts with the answer to the question I asked as to how does he see you. You can also reverse the question and ask yourself how do you see him? If you do be honest with yourself in answering the question.
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You have to decide if it's worth it. If you love him enough to hold onto him, hold on tight. If you find yourself not willing to put that extra effort to treasure the rare moments you have with him, you know it's not meant to be.
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can you both plan more vacations or off times so that they correspond?
You should really talk to him about getting a car for himself so that you dont always have to go to him and see where he is mentally on that. see what his reaction is and if he feels the need for a car to be able to get to you is a high priority or not. If its not then clearly youll know more about the choice to stay with him or not.
where is he in his life? is he in the same phase as you? because a big issue with age can be that your not in the same place in life AKA you might have your life more together, serious, and planned out, where as he is sort of just floating along with no defined plan in mind about the next five to ten years. If he doesnt then this could be a problem and for YOU im sure result in a big disappointment.
good luck. ; )
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