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Having feelings for my bestfriend
AGE : 17, GENDER : MALE. I met this girl in the begining of the ninth grade, I knew who she was but I never had talked to her until we got seated beside each other in class that year. We talked a lot inside and out of class that year and became good friends. In grade 10 we were at a party and one of her friends said she wanted to hook up with me. Long story short nothing escalated that night (both of us were to drunk). This was the point I actually thought I might have feelings for her. She started dating a guy a couple months later which didnt upset me that bad. We continued to talk a decent amount when she was in the relationship... He would often cheat on her and people would tell her but she was pretty indenial about it. He ended up breaking up with her after about a year. Towards the end of there relationship I started to get feelings for her again. When they broke up we hung out began to hang out alot more and texted everyday. It didn't really turn into anything else but being good friends. I started dating a girl from another school a little after that and when I told her she seemed really upset. We didn't really talk much after that for the next couple months until one night when my girlfriend was out of town. We talked for a while just catching up and what not. That night we both had some drinks and we ended up kissing for a few seconds (it was mutual and was the first time it happened). We didn't talk for a while because I still had a girlfriend and I didnt want to screw that up. Like 2 months later I realized my girlfriend wasn't for me and broke up with her. I didn't have feelings for the other girl at this time either. But once grade 12 started this year I began talking to her a lot again and realized how strong my feelings were for her. I guess the past 3 years we had some bad timing with everything but now we are both single. At parties we flirt a lot and she always wants me to stay with her a lot when other guys hit on her. I'm posting this to try to get some feedback on how I could tell her my feelings even though I think she might know. Thanks for reading!
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I think after all your drama and up and downs, you should go for it before its too late. Either say something to her about how you guys seem closer and maybe she will agree or find the right moment to kiss her and see if it is a mutual like. This is the perfect chance to see because you are both available and its's stupid to be scared because it wastes time on something that could be beneficial for both of you.
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ooo this is quite a roller coaster of events!! I believe you should either make more hints about liking her, tell her straight up, or find a moment to kiss her. I believe that you should bring up that time you guys kissed and how close you guys are and maybe she might bring up how you guys have gotten close again or if she gets quiet, you know. Best thing to do is find a moment to kiss her and see if its mutual
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With all the time you've spent on and off keeping in touch and being friends, it won't be as awkward as saying something to someone you just met.
Whatever you say, don't skirt around the issue for fear of losing her as a friend, thats the biggest mistake people make. The other doesn't pick up on it, they part ways for good, marry others and then spend their entire lives wondering 'what if'. If the 'what if' turns out to be that both of you want to pursue a relationship with each other, it's a good thing since you've never totally been able to lose some kind of interest in her, whether as a friend or romantically. Both are important in a relationship. You've figured out already that you can be good friends. An eventual long term partner or future marriage mate, needs to be your best friend and you hers. You'll also need to be able to connect on a sexual level, having the chemistry and total love, not the fleeting thing called New relationship energy which mimics the real thing but only lasts a short while maybe months then disappears. So far, I'd say from what you've shared that she is very interested in you and enjoys your company. So what you have to lose by asking if she has any interest in you besides friendship, such as romantic interests, or if she's at least willing to checking that out? It may be uncomfortable if she doesn't feel the same. But what you have to lose is a great relatioship and great girlfriend is you never ask.
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