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Why does he do that and what does he really want ?
So, there is this guy and i have had a major crush on him for quite some time. (i'm 18, he's 23)
and all throughout the entire time it seemed like he was interested in me too. He'll often come up to me and hug me, touch and carry me up in the air jokingly, say that he missed me and will compliment me too. The first time when we met, he asked me if i had a boyfriend, during my grad, he said he should've been my grad date. Somehow in one of our conversations, he asked why we've never made out before, and kept joking how we should. We went on movie dates, like once or twice, the first time around he paid for me, but then the second time he asked if i could pay him back. One time at a christmas party, i asked if he could drive me home, he said yes, but then 5 minutes later he went behind my back and asked one of my family members to drive me home and when i called him out, he said he didn't.. when he really did....He said that he's never had a girlfriend because he's too busy with school.
And then this summer, he invited me to his house to watch a movie, i came over and in the middle of the movie he asked if i wanted to make out. i asked him what we were, and he said that he liked me but he can't risk being in a relationship right now because he's really busy with his masters in architecture, and that if we did end up breaking up he can't deal with going through a breakup. he said that he knows there just won't be time to spend together, and admitted that he had commitment problems. and so after him realizing that i wanted more than just friends with benefits, in the end, we never made out, we decided not to start anything up. he said that if i wait two years for him, then we could be together. We agreed to still treat each other the same essentially
but anyways so that was a big bummer....
and just today at work, he kissed me on the forehead.
like everything is just confusing me. like his actions are hot and cold. One day he'll be talking to another girl that looks like she likes him, the other he'll like talk to a girl and have long conversations with her, and then with me he'll like do stuff like that he just did.
why does he keep confusing me? do you think he genuinely likes me? and do you think he really means that he'll come around in 2 years? or is it best to just start seeing other people and move on ??
I like him very much , but i hate being antsy about him like this.
its just so hard to say no when he does these types of things.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I'm sure he cares about you. But he's being honest with his intentions about not wanting a relationship. So don't get your hopes up because he's not interested in dating, just hooking up.
Don't wait around for him because he doesn't know what he'll want in two years. How can he be sure that he'll still feel that way for you in two years? How does he know that he won't be too busy for commitment?
What if you wait for him for two years and then it just doesn't happen for whatever reason?
So move on, date other people. If it's meant to be then it will be. But don't hold onto this one.
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I've dealt with a lot of situations involving men, whether they're boyfriends, FWBs, or something else. I'm really sorry to say, but I feel like he is keeping you on the hook with no intention of settling down. I don't know either of you personally, so maybe he does genuinely think you could work out in the 2 year future, but a lot can happen in two years. My advice is, keep him in mind, but don't pass up opportunities for another guy to sweep you off your feet. I feel like it would be good for this guy to see that other guys are interested, and if he gets jealous then you know he truly likes you. Sorry my advice sounds kind of downer, but I know you'll do what you're meant to do and it'll all work out. You're young, enjoy it!
Best Wishes,
Hollywood22
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