I am 13 years old and my sister just turned 16. A few months ago randomly she got a MacBook, new iphone, and a iPad Mini randomly for no reason. I on the other hand have be asking for a new laptop only for the past two years and still haven't recieved one. My parents get mad everytime I ask if I'm going to get a laptop. Also, my sister will say "I have no clothes to wear tomorrow! Please can I go to the mall?" They'll give her $100 and send her off. Though if I ask and haven't bought anything for the past 3 months, it's a "You're always asking for stuff!" It's really not fair because I always have to go without while my sister gets everything. What am I suppose to do when I can't get anything and she does? Also my phone has been cracked and the sound doesn't work for 5 months..but as soon as my sister cracked hers, she got a new one the next day. I'm a good student. I do my work in the house. I listen to my parents and even have better grades than her! She had two f's! I just don't get it..
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Families? lightoftruth answered Monday October 14 2013, 11:19 pm: I wouldn't know exactly why your sister gets more. I'm just guessing it's because she's 16 and you're 13.
I can understand part of it, but not all of it. Like with randomly sending her off for new clothes but you can't, that's what I would consider unfair.
I can understand her getting a new phone and ipad and such since she is older but the clothes I don't understand.
I can somewhat understand the phone situation, but I don't see it as fair. I can see that they'd fix her phone faster because she's older and probably needs the phone more than you do.
I don't know your parents, I don't know why it's like this but you should probably sit down and talk to them. Don't argue with them and don't make yourself sound like a jealous sister. If anything, at least write them a calm letter. [ lightoftruth's advice column | Ask lightoftruth A Question ]
adviceman49 answered Saturday October 12 2013, 11:24 am: I can't tell you why your sister seems to get everything she wants and you get nothing of what you want or it seems that way to you. One reason may be that you are 13 and she is 16.
Being 16 requires more in the way of social upkeep. Meaning she needs to have something's your parents do not see a 13 year old as needing in order to socialize within you age bracket. I don't know if this is right or wrong for a 13 year old girl as I had a boy child and the needs are different than a girls.
What I do know is that you feel left out and unwanted, this is wrong. No child should feel this way. I'm not sure your parents are understanding of this. They may think you are just being jealous of you older sister. This would be to a degree understandable, but still wrong of them.
Is a laptop computer a needed item for a 13 year old. That would depend on whether or not there is another computer in the home for you to use for homework and research.
Is a cell phone a needed item for a 13 year old. Where I live children in middle school and above are now encouraged to have cell phones in school and to use them for internet research during class. Do I agree with this policy. I'm not sure but then again my children are grown and have children of their own so it is up to them to decide. If your school encourages cell phone use for this purpose then your parents need to replace your phone.
Clothing: At 13 you are just starting into your teenage years. Socializing and fitting in is a big part of being a teenager. Having stylish clothes and the in style designer cloths are two different things. I don't know what your parent can and cannot afford. Given what you say they bought your sister they could have bought her one less item and bought you some stylish clothes. That I agree with.
What I suggest you do is sit down with mom and dad and tell them how you feel. Speak to them calmly, without shouting or crying. If you are unsure that you can have a quiet conversation with them in that manner then write them a letter. Tell them you feel left out and even unwanted if that is the way you feel. But don't write it in a manner that sounds like you're being jealous which will be hard to do as you will want to point out why you feel this way.
You could say something like: It is not from jealousy but simple fact that I asking for a bit of parity with my older sister. Sisters cell phone gets cracked and it is replaced the next day, mine has been broken for months and has not been replaced. How else am I suppose to feel if not left out or even unwanted. I need new clothes I don't get any. She asks to go to the mall and gets shopping money. Is this fair.
As parents we do not intentionally treat our children differently. We do sometimes reward one child differently than the other to insure the prosper and grow properly. You by your own words are growing and prospering without being rewarded. From what you write your sister, at least from an education standpoint is not. TO foster better grades your parents are doing more for her to encourage her. You don't seem to need this encouragement. Unfortunately we forget that this can also look like we are favoring one child over the other. You need to point this out to them in a calm matter.
If you need to do this in a letter then do so. Sometimes we as parents need a wake up call. Lets see if we can give your parents the right kind of wake up call. One that does involve you being harmed. [ adviceman49's advice column | Ask adviceman49 A Question ]
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