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Was I ready?
Iv been with my bf for a year now I m 18f and he's 20. I do hand jobs for him and can return to me but i got weird when he did oral on me is it normal to feel that way because I kind of liked it but I hate that I can't return that to him I'm not comfortable at all. He doesn't mind that u don't retire it. were not big on religion but we do prefer internal sex When marriage comes . I really don't know if I should've let him go far I kind of wish we were a clean couple again but its late now I left my self go with his sexual moves on me that drifted me to like it and enjoy it. He says he sees me with him for years and years but I simply can't say that back maybe because I see myself pursuing all my dreams before being with someone. I don't want to hurt him what so ever he was there when I went through suicidal thoughts and many other stuff. He means a lot to me. Maybe I'm not high sexual like him.
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I just don't think you're ready for a serious relationship.
You don't have to feel bad for not returning the favor. It's not necessary and it's good that he doesn't pressure you.
If you're not comfortable with any of the sexual things, then tell him. If you just can't see a future with him, end the relationship. It's not fair to stay with him when you're both on different pages and you don't see him in your future.
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You should always listen to yourself, before listening to others. If somethings doesn't feel right or uncomfortable than it may be a good idea to examine why your feeling that way. People don't generally lie to themselves so when you feel something, than their usually is a reason behind it. Above all be honest with him about how you feel, regardless of how he has helped you, he should respect how you feel.
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