There is this guy I like, we have history together. But never went out. We haven't talked in a while and we started to. Ive been scared to attempt any relationships, so I seem to have pushed him away. But I have always cared for him, and he is special to me. I relized that I dont want to lose him. But he doesn’t speak to me at all. And I have apologized. What should I do?
Either way, you can't make someone talk to you. If he won't even talk to you face to face then you probably need to let him go.
You could write him short note and if he still doesn't want anything to do with you, then just let him go. [ lightoftruth's advice column | Ask lightoftruth A Question ]
Dragonflymagic answered Saturday August 17 2013, 3:16 pm: I must be missing something here. You have apologized? But for what? Is there something you have said or done that he has taken the stance of choosing to not forgive on?
If thats so, you've done your part, now forgive yourself and move on. People who hold grudges and can't or won't forgive, are not healthy individuals to be in friendship with let alone in a relationship with.
I do know not what you mean by having history together. I would interpret it to mean you've attend same high-school or college, or worked at same company or belonged to same club, so thats how you know about him. When some say we have history, it means they were in a relationship together but broke up, and yet when others say it, the history they are talking about is constantly fighting with the individual whether friend or in a relationship with.
I don't think there is a way to force anyone to speak to someone they are against speaking to. So if he doesnt answer texts or calls or doesnt even respond to Hi how are you face to face, there isn't anything you can do.
You have a care or crush on someone that for all I know you don't even really know much of anything about. What you may be attracted to on the outside may not translate into the perfect match or partner for you. Maybe he's a precious guy. But you didn't say you know him well so all I can advise is to avoid getting your mind so wrapped up in this one person.
Focus on yourself and trying to learn what your fears and issues are with getting close to a person of the opposite sex? If its mostly just not understanding guys and afraid you'll mess up, then read some books on how to relate to the opposite sex. Those are very helpful things to study. If you have trouble with shyness in general, again study how to overcome that, if it is a fear of sexual intimacy in future if it goes that way, you need to learn to become comfortable with yourself first. Theres lots on line and in books to help you discover that all on your own first and enjoy it. Then later it wont be so scary to add a man into the mix. If I still got all my guesses wrong, then hon...you're just going to have to spell it out better for me. You can write specifically to me by going to my column and writing to my inbox. [ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question ]
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