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How to get out of the friend zone?
So i like this guy and he might like me back. We have held hands etc. But i think that i might have been friend zoned. How to i get him to date me. What makes it worse is that i use to date his friend.
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You can't say that you are friendzoned until you actually understand the meaning of being friendzoned. He might be taking it slow, so you should just be patient. Maybe he does like you but he will take his time because, honestly, it can be pretty pressurizing for the guy to ask a girl out. Eh if you really aren't sure, you should just straight up ask him if he likes you or not. It never hurts to ask.
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I think that in order for us to advise you, there are a few more details you could have provided us with. But I do appreciate short and sweet, so let me do my best to advise you.
You guys have held hands. Now, unless that's a normal thing you do with your guys friends, I'd say that you're already creeping out of the friend zone.
Have you guys talked about your feelings? I'm not sure how old you are and I realize that when you're younger (>16), it's harder to be upfront. But, I'd say it's worth mentioning just to put an end to your curiosity.
What's possible is that he DOES have feelings for you, but he is hesitant to act on them because of your past with his friend. Now, some guys don't care at all. I dated the best friend of one of my exes for 2 years and it was no big deal. But, not everyone is as cool with that.
How long ago did you hold hands? Has there been any flirtation since? Does he flirt with other girls? What indicates that he has friend-zoned you?
The best advice I can give to you is just to be honest with him. Whether it be through a letter, or text, or in person, or whatever, I think that what you need to do is say "Hey, is it just me or do we have a connection?"
What's the worst that can happen? So he says no, then at least you know where you stand and that it is time for you to move on. Or he could say that he does have feelings for you, but the history with his friend makes him hesitant to date you. In that case, the two of you need to talk to your friend and make sure there's no weirdness. Your crush may just be too afraid to face him alone. Or he may just say he does like you but was afraid you didn't like him back. There you go, you get the guy and all ends well!
Just don't wait for everything to happen to you. Sometimes you need to make things happen for yourself. Good luck! I hope it ends well :)
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So why do you think you have been friend zoned? You guys already went past the friends stage by holding hands.
You can't make anyone date you. He has to want you.
So what made him friend zone you?
Is it because he was heartbroken before and would rather not get into a relationship?
If that's it, he still has a lot of baggage to work through and isn't ready for a relationship.
Is it because he's just not attracted to you?
This one you can't change at all.
Being in the friend zone is when he only sees you as a friend.
If you want different results, you need to change what you're doing. That doesn't mean totally change who you are and your entire personality though.
Starting with your looks, like I said, you don't have to go overboard. Each guy has different taste in women, different body types. Most guys would agree on liking a happy, fit, healthy woman. Don't aim to be skinny or something, just to be healthy. It definitely helps your self esteem even if you don't end up with this guy.
With make up, there's different looks for each person. Find what looks best with you. You don't need make up. But I've noticed a lot of girls feel more confident while wearing it. So even if it's not very noticeable, you might just come off as more confident.
Same with the way you dress. Don't dress to look like everyone else or to grab a guys attention. You'll just get the attention the wrong way. You want him to want to date you, not jump right into bed with you.
What's more important is putting things in your life that makes you happy. If you're just looking for a guy to make you happy, it's not very attractive. To start a relationship, you need to be a happy, fulfilled person.
Keep in mind that the majority of guys aren't interested in difficult girls. Not a girl who has drama following her. A normal, happy girl will have a happier relationship.
Lastly, don't chase him. You don't need the relationship. It's definitely fine to want one though. Chasing implies that you're desperate.
If all else fails, don't limit your options. There are tons of guys out there and you don't have to wait around for one who can't seem to make up his mind.
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