|
Boyfriend Problems
18/f
I've asked a question similar on here awhile ago about me and my boyfriend. We worked through the problem (I thought we did) but it has come back up again and I'm not sure what to do.
We started dating the beginning of my senior year. So we've been dating for about a year and a half. Like every other relationship, it started out great and then became harder.
The problem right now is that he has been getting frustrated over everything. The number one problem I have is that whenever I am upset over something, he turns cold and gets upset. Lately, I've been trying to deal with my personal problems with my family. Like money, losing our house, looking for a job, my mom went to rehab and my younger brother went to juvi. It's a lot for me to handle even though it's not too much but I've been a little upset over it lately. He'll just pat my back or something and then will go do something else. That ends up making me more upset and I ask him why he does that. He'll get angry and say he doesn't know. He tells me that he doesn't know what he's supposed to do. So I'll tell him to just sit with me and tell me it's going to be ok. But then the next time he does the same thing again.
Whenever I try to bring it up, he just gets mad all over again.
I do my best not to fight with him because it doesn't solve anything and it just results with me crying and him leaving.
So now I don't lean on him or tell him about what's going on.
The thing is, when my family was having even more difficult problems months ago, he was so good to me. He has changed a lot and he knows he has too.
Another small thing that has been bothering me is that yesterday I was texting him and I was going to tell him something sweet but personal and I asked him if anybody was with him. He flipped out and asked if I was accusing him of something. (I guess he was referring to cheating) And then when I told him what I meant he said, "Oh ok haha"
Today we hung out and everything was fine until we went back to his house. He got a call from work and they told him that he was going to work today and his hours are crazy and wasn't supposed to be working today so I asked, "You didn't tell them you couldn't work?" And he got mad saying that I was mad at him. But I was just asking a question. Then I felt so stressed out and I just laid down and he left and went to work. So I went home.
I know this relationship is going wrong. He told me awhile ago he wanted space. After that, we had a messy fight he said that he loves me but doesn't know what's going to happen in the future. I told him I'm not going to stay with him and hope that maybe I can be a part of his future. He has to know if he wants me or not.
I put so much effort into him to just break up and give up. I do love him and during our good times, he's great. And he's the one person I have right now. All my friends are gone after we graduated and the only ones that are still around are the friends that were not good people. It makes things harder because my dad loves him. And he helps out my dad whenever he needs it and he's met all my family. So then there's the pressure from the family. I love him and I just miss the guy he used to be.
Anyways, I'm sorry that this is crazy long. I'm planning on ending it if he truly doesn't feel it anymore. If he's just really stressed out from school and work, I want to know how to work through this. How do you get through a problem like this?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Honey, you've already figured it out when you say, "I know this relationship is going wrong"
All you needed was to hear someone agree.
Look at it this way, is he weakening who you are at core? Or is he strengthening who you are at core?
To further explain: weakening would range from wanting to change you, to not giving the type of emotional support you require, making slight of your issues and needs
Strengthening is accepting you for who you are, with all that entails, willing to support and uphold you, who you are becoming, that which you do and create like your job, school, hobbies. etc...
Now which one is happening in your relationship? If you don't like the answer, then its time to find a young man who does fit the description you are looking for. Lastly,Don't let feelings get in the way of your better judgement.
]
More Questions: |