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boyfriend issues/getting closer
my boyfriend and I recently went through a rough patch, we made up by talking talking about it, then just dealing with it, then making out. he initiated the kissing, he was mostly having a problem with me, but i was annoyed with him for being distant. he leaves for college in a little over a month. we made up about five days ago, and on the fifth day, we got a lot closer. he fingered me for the first time. we were so close, and then his best friend was hanging out with us that night, ans he acted weird. he only acts differently when he is around that one guy friebd of his. he seems uncomfortable around me, and doesn't touch me.other than that, he is great, we talk, kiss, and have a great time now. but even when he is out with him and i try to talk to him, unaware he is out, he acts weird. is this normal? should i ask him about it? am i clingy? was it wrong of us to get closer?
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I don't think you're clingy unless you were constantly texting him or calling him or always wanting to hang out with him.
I think you should sit down and talk to him about it. It's obviously making you feel a little awkward when he's a little awkward so ask him if he could explain why. He probably won't even want to tell you but you could at least try.
I don't think there is another way to find out why he acts that way unless he tells you. Don't nag him about it or anything, just be calm and nice. Don't let it turn it into a fight.
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I can think of only one other possibility which is far fetched but in this strange evolving world of ours, very real. Perhaps he is bi-sexual and his best friend is his other partner. Like I said, far fetched but if i understood correct, if boyfriend and best friend are out in public and you accidently happen across them, he acts very weird. There is no reason for him to feel uncomfortable to be discovered out with his friend unless he feels guilty about it, like it is cheating on you.
When you do ask him questions, don't ask for partners but ask if he is gay or bi sexual. You have a right to know. If you are ok with just being friends no matter what he tells you, say so. But you need all honestly from him.
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As a girlfriend you have the right to seek the attention of your boyfriend. This does not make you clingy. It means that you care for him and like his company. From what you write about your boyfriend, it does not seem that he is on the same page. There can be many reasons for this. His friend can be saying things about you and your boyfriend is not stepping up and defending you. It can also mean that your boyfriend does not want to show too much public affection for fear of what others might say. Showing PDA can be a sign of loosing his "man card" in his eyes. The last thing it could mean is that he really is not that into you. He may just like the physical aspect of the relationship but does not think you are wifey material. Whatever the reason is, you should not accept it. My advice: Confront him about your feelings. See where he is at in the relationship and do not take the physical into account because that says little about a relationship. Listen to him and accept what he says. He may not want to be serious. If he does, demand the respect that you deserve. Let him know that he has to change the way he treats you and you will not tolerate it. Be open to whatever he says even if it is difficult to hear. You are worth it. In the end it's up to you and the respect you get is taught and demanded by you.Hope that helps!
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