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i'm 13 and my boyfriend is 15 and i'm really want to have sex with him..
i realy lovemy boyfriend and he loves me more than i do.i really want to let him take my virginity becase hes the one i love.he never ask me for sex.but i really want to do it with him.hes gonna use a condom and he always tell me that he wants me to be his baby mother and his wife.i want to get pregnant for him because hes always there for me.we've been togeter for 7 months now,if i get pregnant i know he will be there for me and the baby no matter what....anyways i really want an good advice what shoulhd i do.nd i'm from
barbados
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hi,
I'm old enough to be your grandfather yet I'm not going to lecture you on the evils of YOUNG teenage sex. Instead what I would like to do is talk to you about life; especially the many teenage years you have ahead of you.
Yes; I understand you are in love with this boy. This is a first love. Here in America and probably where you live parents call this puppy love. For it is the first of what will most likely be many times you will fall in love before you find your future husband or wife in the case of a boy. This is what teenage life is supposed to be all about. Dating and having fun, going to parties, learning about makeup and making out. All that stuff that teenagers do.
If you give up your virginity to this boy you come to regret it. I'm not saying you should not or will not have sex before your married. Even in your country many or most of your parents and even your grandparents did not go to their wedding beds virgins. Most likely you will not either.
At age 13 you are truly to young to be having sex. You may possess a body of a women but your body is still developing; including your reproductive system. This includes your vagina's ability to stretch and accept a penis. You need to allow your body to mature some more before you attempt having sex or it will be very painful for you and not much fun.
Also if your boyfriend is pushing you to have sex with him it is not because he loves you. Not in the way you love him; it is because he lusts for you. There is a big difference. Puberty, which you and he are both going through, is making him or causing him to find an outlet for his sexual energy. This causes young boys to confuse love and lust.
He does not love you in the same manner you love him, this I am sure of as even though I am as old as I am, I was once his age. Once he gets what he wants from you he will like most boys his age he will most likely move on to another girl your age to see if he can score with another virgin. It is a game all boys play to see how many virgins they can have. The more virgins they deflower the more manly they are looked at by their friends. This game has gone on for ages and I'm sure it is played by the boys in your country as well as other countries that I am aware of.
My advice is not to have sex with this boy. If he is pushing or begging you to have sex with him he doesn't love you in the same manner you love him. Find a boy that is 13 or 14 to date. Give yourself time to grow and mature before you decide to have sex.
You will know when the time is right. When it is you will not have to write us to ask about it you will know the time is right. For now I would say your body needs at least 2 to 3 years to mature before you can enjoy your first sexual experience. Before then it could be a very painful experience for you.
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So if you really love him, why can't you wait?
He might be a really good guy but at your age, you shouldn't rush these kinds of things.
In the future, I'm sure he would like you to be his wife and mother his child but right now? Why would you risk that?
If you get pregnant, he may stick around, he may not. Even if you do get pregnant and he stays, does he have a job? Do you have a job? How will you afford a child? Your parents can't take care of it for you. I'm sure he'll be there for you but take care of the child with food, bottles, diapers. Children are very expensive.
Then you both will be putting off your education. You won't be able to afford an education when you have a kid. Having a child makes life so much more complicated.
So if you love him, then wait. Don't have sex and risk losing everything.
Plus, you've only been together for 7 months. It's not very long.
At 13, your body is still developing. It will hurt like crazy if you do it now.
Not only that, you could suffer emotionally. Sex is a very important, emotional thing. If you do it, it can take a huge toll on your life.
If you want to be his wife one day, wait to do this. At least for a couple years, if he loves you, he won't mind.
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So you trust this guy that much that you're willing to have his child at 13? And you just believe he's going to stick around?
You don't know the first thing about sex let alone love. First of all the age difference is a problem. Second of all, you are to young to get a job so how do you expect to take care of a baby? Your boyfriend is old enough to get a job, but what makes you think he's going to give up his childhood to raise a baby? You can't trust everybody who says they love you. I don't know how things work in Barbados so I could be wrong about your boyfriend, but here in America, teenagers having kids isn't something you do on purpose.
I think you need to slow down with your boyfriend.
IF HE LOVES YOU AS MUCH AS YOU SAY HE DOES AND YOU BELIEVE HE WON'T LEAVE YOU, THEN HE WON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH WAITING TO HAVE SEX AND CHILDREN. That's how you know he loves you. You can't just say he loves me. You got to test it out and see it for yourself. You know somebody loves you when they respect your boundaries, your beliefs, your mind and your body.
If you ask me, you shouldn't have sex for a few years. If you can't wait until after marriage, then at least wait until you're 18. Don't rush into it right now. There's nothing wrong with waiting to have sex, it just means you have more time to develop an emotional relationship with eachother.
I hope I didn't sound harsh at the beginning. I'm just tired of seing these questions from really young teenagers who want to act without thinking and then the next thing you know, everything is blowing up in their face and falling apart. So just take your time and wait. And if your boyfriend can't respect your decision to wait, then he's NOT THE ONE.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
P.S: Feel free to talk to me anytime.
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