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Does My BF have ED?
I know none of you are doctors but you might have some insight on this:
We are both 22, my boyfriend is healthy weight and healthy inside as far as I know, he doesn't have diabetes or high blood pressure or anything like that. But when we are in bed, he cannot stay hard. He has told me that he really wants to have sex with me but we have tried so many times and we still can't do it. I'm not mad because of the sex, it is just frustrating because I can tell he gets very upset that he can't do it. I don't know if there is anything I can do to help, I try so hard!
Do you think the problem could be erectile dysfunction? And do you have any tips for me/him?
Thanks
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This is a form of Erectile Dysfunction. It's often psychological and I agree with others that he may want to see a doctor to narrow it down and determine if an underlying disease is causing it. But only if it's necessary as there's no test to really see what causes ED, to my knowledge.
As for suggestions, if it is psychological, he shouldn't think so much. Even anticipation of losing the erection may cause him to lose it. It's a vicious cycle. It might be impossible not to fear it happening again, but it might be good to at least try.
If he smokes, he should stop.
Eating blackberries and dark chocolate may help.
Exercise is said help as well. I would suggest a combination of aerobic exercises (walking, jogging, etc) and resistance exercises (weightlifting or something similar). And Kegels (a penis exercise involving holding the muscle used to stop a stream of urine for several seconds at a time. Not necessarily while he's peeing, of course) wouldn't hurt either.
Hope some of these tips are useful. If not, he might want to consider medications that stimulate blood flow, like Viagra.
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I agree with seeing a doctor and not getting upset with him over it. If he's on or has been on medication for awhile for any ailment that could have sexual side-effects start with eliminating that. There can also be a ton of other reasons medically related for not being able to trap blood long enough for sex.
The other thing is that it could be psychological and a fear of something be it STD, pregnancy, hurting you or some hangup even from when he was younger that gets in his head and kills things for him when he tries to start. Ask him if he's afraid or not and talk about it.
The other thing is that there is actually a product out there that if you are 18+ you can get that works to trap the blood in his penis long enough to engage in intercourse. Adult novelty stores sell it and it's a plastic ring device. It goes by a really vulgar name though so you'll have to describe what you need. A lot of people with this problem use it. Otherwise,send him to the doctor.
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He should see a doctor.
There isn't much more to say. He's so young, if its a problem that can be managed by a doctor, wouldn't that be soooo much better to know now, rather than years later.
Suggest, gently, that he see a doctor. He may not be keen on the idea, but hopefully he can warm up to it.
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