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Mom cheating on step-dad?
My step-dad is in Mexico, and my mom met this guy at the bar. They have been texting, and I saw some pictures that I would rather not have seen. He's been coming to our house while we've been sleeping. What should I do?
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I think that you should confront your mom about it. It may be the most awkward conversation of your life and she may blow you off and not want to talk about it, but it's the only thing you really can do without causing a ton of pain and trouble. If she's making a bad choice here, calling her out on it might be just what needs to happen for her to snap out of it.
You have to approach the conversation from the right place or you won't get very far. You have to be calm and not accuse her of anything. Simply confront her with the evidence and ask her if anything is going on. If it is, she'll probably be extremely embarrassed and she may get defensive. This wouldn't be something that she would have wanted you to notice and the fact that you did is going to upset her.
If she denies it, gets really angry with you, or shuts down, tell her that if she's doing what it looks like she's doing you don't approve and that if she doesn't tell your dad when he gets back that you will show tell him about what you know. Never once should you accuse her of cheating. The best way to go about this is to continue confronting her with the evidence. Talk about the text messages that you saw and ask her why this guy is coming over at night. If you back her into a corner with things that she can't explain away, it'll go much better for you than if you go up to her and say "I know you're cheating". Unless you've actually seen it take place, you can't know for sure.
Another thing that's important is that even if she isn't having sex with this guy or anything, it's sometimes still considered cheating to have an emotional relationship with someone else. Sending those types of pictures and having him come over at night is probably not something she'd be proud to tell your dad so even if it's not physical cheating, it's still wrong and she knows it.
Like I said, this could be the most awkward and difficult conversation of your life, but it's something that you have to do. Make sure that you prepare for the consequences as well. Your parents may split up because of this. It's less likely to happen if you can get your mom to go to your dad. Don't wait around for him to catch her. The fact that you found out before him and that you can try to help the situation is a wonderful thing. If they do end up splitting up, you can't blame yourself for it because you blew the whistle. Letting your mom know what you've seen is the best thing that you can do right now to try to save their relationship.
I wish you the best of luck and I hope that your family can work this all out.
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You should do nothing. It is not your place to police your mothers morals or sex life. You do not say how long your father will be in Mexico. This leaves open some questions that you do not need to know about.
If your father is going to be away for a long period of time they may have made an agreement concerning sex and their needs. There are couples that do this. I'm not saying your parents do or do not have such an agreement. If they do the only thing your mother is doing wrong is bringing this man into your home where you could see this happening.
If no such agreement exist then your confronting your mother on this can only lead to problems you don't need to face. Whatever your mothers reason for having an affair they are hers not yours. She is still your mother and she still loves you and still deserves your respect and love.
Nothing good can come out of telling mom or dad that you know mom is cheating. My advice to you, for now, is to forget about what you have seen and go one with your life.
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