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Living Together Before Marriage
Hey there. I need some advice on something that's been bothering me for a while. I would like to know if it's right or wrong to live together before marriage? What are the reasons of why it's right? What are the reasons of why it's wrong? My ex that I just broke up with told me that she would rather wait until marriage to be living with her lover. I however would rather live with my future wife before marriage if possible. It gives me the chance to see how they normally live and how we can fix issues we don't like about each other. Her reasoning of why she didn't want to live together is because it states in the bible that living together before marriage is wrong. I too am religious, but disagree with that fact in the bible. But I know that once once gets married, your stuck with that person for good. I don't want to ever get divorced and my ex also doesn't believe in getting divorced either. But that wasn't the reason she broke up with me. We broke up because it did seem like the relationship was moving too fast and it seemed like she wanted to get married sooner than later and she was very clingy at times which I hated and she was offended when I would say that to her. She however has been in a couple abusive relationships and had other abuse to her in the past. As a result of the abuse, often she would whine about stuff quite frequently too.
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Thank you for your question. Whether or not to live together before marriage is something I hear people argue about fairly often, and it is definitely something that comes with it's good points and bad. I can't say much as far as religion goes, because I'm not very religious, but I can say that if your beliefs are very important to you, this would be something to really take in consideration (which I can see you're already doing). Now, other than religion, there are a few other things to consider.
I have always been an advocate of living together before marriage because of the reasons you stated: You really get to know someone, their habits, their routines, their quirks, and it can help you determine whether or not you are going to be able to live with them forever. The little things that annoy you about each other may be easier to deal with if there isn't the added pressure of being married involved.
On the other side of this, one of the possible cons of living together before marriage is that you could lose the excitement of "being married." If you're already living together, then you won't have that big change that a lot of people do, and you could miss out on the excitement of that.
Those are just a few of the possible pros and cons of this situation. While I usually recommend living together before marriage, ultimately it is up to the couple to decide, and is not a decision that should be taken lightly. Lots of communication between partners is needed to ensure that whatever decision you make is the best one.
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