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knowing i should move on but i cant :(
The guy I've been off and on with for 3 years (mostly on with a few breakups)is not the perfect guy for me in just a few ways. All these ways have nothing to do with personality. He is addicted to rescription pills and just about any drug when he gets in his lows. I've constantly tried to help him but he always pushes me away and then comes back.Fact is, I was probably enabling him more than helping him back then.
Last time he relapsed (a month and a half ago) after going 90 days clean and being in rehab, I figured enough was enough and ended it. He keeps coming back here and then saying he still loves me. And it sucks cause I still am SO in love with him but know I can't be with him.
I'm just hoping for some advice on moving on. I know the first step is accepting the decision to and I'm having trouble doing that. I keep wishing that he would just get clean and we could be together. This guy is like perfect for me personality wise. We click so well and only ever fight about the drugs. Plus we have an insane physical attraction that I'm also missing :/ I feel like I'm never gonna get through this. I just really really crave to be happy again. I can't stand this pain :(
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Well, since everyone here is going to tell you to leave him, I'm gonna help you with ACTUALLY doing just that, because neither of the others realized that you were asking "I want to know how" and not "but I don't want to..." so here it is:
I'm 14 & I have never had a boyfriend :) but I do know a lot about getting over someone. I have a big crush on this guy and he got a girlfriend THE SAME F***ING DAY THAT I WAS ABOUT TO ASK HIM OUT!!! So, to get over that guy, this is what I did. I sat in my room, with my computer off, phone off, tv off, everything off except the light. I sat there and I just meditated, and left only 1 thought in my head: him. Jeremy. Then as I closed my eyes, I started to see some really AHEM attractive guys that I knew running through my mind and I'm not saying that I started to like those guys but they got my mind off of him. It reminded me that there were hotter and more loyal and trustworthy than Jeremy. After a couple of days, it had an effect. After about a little over a week, I was over him. After the first couple of times meditating, I just sat and thought about why it was I actually liked him. I focused on the "why" and not the "why not" like I used to. It will take longer for you of course because you used to be with this guy and not admiring from afar but I'm confident that it can still work for you. :) Besides, the same thing happened to me with another guy only a month ago and it still works for me! so yeah... My life sucks.
Don't give up on yourself, & of course don't give up on him, but that doesn't mean that you get back with him. That is the worst thing you can do now. You would be showing him that he can manipulate you. You don't want that, trust me!!!
So there you go, and I hope you try this made-up-yet-fool-proof trick of mine. I wish you the best of luck :)
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I believe you are the same person who asked a similar question awhile back?
Honestly, You need to just leave him. This guy isn't helping himself and you just can't help him. It is time to except that, You cannot help someone who doesn't want to be helped.
His problem will drag you down, His begging for you to come back into his life is only going to do you both more harm then good. If you want to help him, Then move on. Hopefully a piece of reality will get him to clean up his act.
If you crave to be happy so badly, Then move on and meet someone who isn't hooked up on pills. I'm not trying to be an ass but you are just wasting your time hoping he will change. Maybe he will, Maybe he won't but in the meantime you need to focus on YOU. You also have a life too live and you need to stop allowing him to hold you back because as long as you crawl back to him you are missing other opportunities in your life.
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First off let me say, I am not going to judge you or your on and off boyfriend. No one should judge you. I am going to answer your question with the best advice as possible.
I am just a 13 year old girl who is still waiting for a moment that I can find love. But it's hard and I am too young! I shoukd be lisgening to One Direction and be going to Justin Bieber concerts!
I honestly think that you should leave him. Yeah I know, it is hard to let go of the people you love,but he needs help. When people say that enough is enough,they mean it. They don't keep running back. If you keep doing that, he is going to expect that. Just because you two won't be a couple, doesn't mean you guys can't be good friends. You can support him in every way and be there to comfort him when he needs to be consoled. Hope my advice can help! :)
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