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Conflicted mess: Is he going to leave his girlfriend for me? If so, then what do I do?
I've recently found myself starting to develop very strong feelings for a friend of mine...trouble is, he has a girlfriend already...however, I get very strong vibes of a mutual attraction, and all the signs that guys show when they like a girl...I've always been a very good judge of whether or not a guy likes me or not, and my heart tells me he does...and that's not just wishful thinking on my part because I like him.
And let me just say, he knows that I like him, BUT, he also knows, because I adamantly told him, that I will NOT try to break them up, and that is nowhere near what my intentions are. I do NOT want to be "that girl"...and I can't stand the thought of being responsible for someone's misery in that type of situation...
Anyways...so back to his girlfriend...I don't know her all that well, but I like her, and regardless of whether or not I liked her or not, I still do NOT want her to get hurt...but I've gotten hints of the relationship going through some bumps...
That...and I got an anonymous letter from someone telling me that even though they are with someone, they feel a stronger connection to me, and that if they were single, they would find themselves falling in love with me...
There is NO one else that feels that way about me, and it's too much of a coincidence for me to not believe it's him...
Now...I'm not getting my hopes up...mainly because, again, I don't want his girlfriend to get hurt...that and I am afraid of letting myself completely trust him if he could leave her that easily for me...
But all that aside...suppose it just isn't working out between them? If he's truly not happy with her, and he does decide to leave her...I'll obviously play it cool...he may not be leaving her for ME, but at the same time, I still feel like he feels for me...
Anyways, I'm just asking...if this were a situation where he WAS going to leave her for me...how do I respond? What if his girlfriend was emotionally destroyed? What about her family? I don't want anyone to get hurt...I know sometimes it's not unavoidable...I've never quite been in a situation like this before...
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I think you are totally handling this like a mature adult. and in a responsible way as well.
With saying that. He is not single. and that might not change. If it does. it is realistic to say that the gf is going to be hurt. not matter what. us girls hurt after a relationship ends. Because we are afraid to be alone. nomatter if it was a week and a half or a 3 year relationship.
If he does end up leaving her. you must let him fully heal from this. You do not want to end up being the rebound. especially if you like him.
All you can do at this point is be there to support him, and his relationship with her. because that is what good friend's do.
~Jasmine*
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I think it's nice on your part that you don't want to her to get hurt, but if she can't make him happy she should let him go. Sooner or later she'll see that it just didn't work out. If he chooses you though, wait. I advise you take it slowly and express how you feel. Even if you do like this girl, if you don't take good care of what you have, someone else will. If you feel that maybe you and this guy can work out, take it slow and think about it. Look at all the bad things and good things, don't lie to yourself. If he has more bad things than good things, then I advise you talk to him about it. Some things you can work on, or compromise. Take your time and don't rush anything! Best of luck! {:
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