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Opinion please!

Question Posted Monday June 25 2012, 3:29 pm

Hi Razhie,
I really admire your advice on here, so I just wondering if you could help me out or give me an opinion on my excerpt. Thank you so much!
20/f. I have been with my bf for 18 months now, and sometimes I contemplate whether or not we will be together forever or if I am wasting my time. We have so much fun together and definitely lots in common, but we also have very big differences as well, such as some of my friends obviously don't like him, and my family is not a fan of him either. As for his friends and family, they love me. There isn't a really solitified reason why some of my friends and family don't like him, it just kind of came to be that way. I'm also very outgoing and social, with lots of friends; he has one good friend, and two other casual friends. It may not seem like a big difference, but it is when it comes down to making plans and lifestyles, etc. As my last point, sometimes I think he can be a bit immature for our age, but only with his not having a job reasoning, and how he never pays EVER when we go out. Actually, I pay almost all of the time, unless he brings money, then we pay separately. I have listed a lot of negatives, but there are lots of positives as well. I just don't know what to do or what to think. Any opinion would be very appreciated, thank you! Sorry this was long.

[ Answer this question ]
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Razhie answered Monday June 25 2012, 8:06 pm:
It sounds like it's just not working for you.

You don't really give us very much to go on, but I'm going to assume that if this relationship was working for you, you probably wouldn't be asking a question.

Some times it's a bit of good luck to have a massive, obvious reason that a relationship isn't going to work - like cheating, for instance - but more often it's just a slow and gradual realization that you don't have the relationship you really want to have.

A lot of the things you mention here are also not long-term things. Nothing about goals or plans for the future, just dating. Maybe that's what you want right now - just to date - or maybe you are looking for more in your relationship. No way for me to know.

If the money issue is bugging you, bring it up. Talk it out. Money is a major issue for many couples, and it only get worse if you let it lie.

If you just aren't certain of the relationship overall - there is nothing much anyone can say. You'll need to figure out a bit more about what you want, and if this is someone you can get that with or not.

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