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Suicide: im afraid I might do something bad.
Can someone please help me, I have been really depressed for the past couple years, im 16 years old im really poor I have a dad who hits my mom, im 230 pounds ive been joining sports to lose weight( not working) my girlfriend cheats on me. I get into fights, I have hardly no friends, i have an anger problem and i pick fights with my dad. Lately after I found out my gf has been cheating on me, my depression has hit an all time high, I have been alienating my self from everyone for the past month. I had been having really bad suicidle thoughts lately, but I cant get myself to do it. Im not afraid to die, its just thought of how im going to die. Is there an afterlife, im I going to hell if I kill myself, will anybody care?. I just need someone to help me, because I have been driving myself crazy lately and im afraid I might do something ad. Can someone help me?
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There are a lot of things to address here, but firstly let me say that suicide is not the answer.
If your dad is abusive towards your mother you can report it to a school counselor or teacher. While it won't necessarily fix the situation, they should be able to give you some advice. Try talking to your mom and really express how much it affects you. There are probably reasons (valid or not) why she stays with an abusive man. If it's money she's worried about, offer to get a part time job to help out. If she's just scared of being alone, reassure her that you'll be by her side if she decides to split up with him. She ultimately has to make the decision to leave him or seek counseling, but you can help her make that decision.
If your girlfriend cheats, you need to leave her. A relationship is about trust and communication. Cheating is probably the worst type of betrayal. It makes you feel worthless, and at times it can seem like there is no way out. However, if you let her abuse you emotionally, are you all that much different from your mother? Breaking up can be difficult, and it will suck at first. Sometimes you just have to break away and let the healing process begin. I promise you will get over her. It might take weeks, months, or even a year, but one day you'll be walking down the street and realize that you haven't even thought about her in a while, and you will be much better off at that point.
Losing weight can be difficult. It takes commitment. Counting calories is ultimately the easiest way to lose weight. It essentially comes down to calories in to calories out. I would try to focus on consuming no more than 2200 calories a day with at least 30 minutes of physical exercise every day. You will want to lower your caloric intake after a while to under 2000, but at your current weight, that should be fine. Weigh yourself every week or two. Don't do it every day or you might not see consistent improvements which can be discouraging.
At 16 you have a lot of changes in your near future. You will either be looking at college or entering the work force within the next couple years, and that could take your life in a much more positive direction. Things can suck in high school. People are mean, even cruel. You want more freedom, but parents seem to hold on even tighter. On top of this, you have hormones going crazy in your brain which can cause you to feel like you have no control at times.
Life is short enough as it is. Your current situation won't last forever, and the sooner you decide to do something about it, the sooner you can be on your way to a brighter future. Ultimately don't worry so much about the friends, girlfriends, and parents. It's your life and you should try to be the person YOU want to be. When you can reach a point where you truly love yourself, other things will start to fall into place.
Good luck. Take care. And keep in touch.
-Sam
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Hey,
myself is in a bad problem too, so no worries your not alone. I think that it is selfish to think that way though, like you think nobody gives. It's also selfish to kill yourself. You don't know 100% that nobody cares and what would happen to that one person you do leave behind?
You gotta think more about yourself, not whats around you. What is your goal in life? wanna be a doctor? Go for it, nothing can put you down. Just don't fall in the path your mom and/or dad fell in. Try to prove you can make the best of yourself.
You got siblings? Just talk to them, no matter how awkward. If you got more problem talk them out to somebody.
And why care about appearance, it's personality! plus you don't have to be a model to live. You just need the brains. if you got none then try. Try and never give up. That is what I do.
But if you need to be alone get money like a $20 and go outside at night. Buy a favorite drink then find a comfy place like a park or a lake then just drink your drink and just think. If you really wanna just think out loud. That's what I do when I get sad, angry, or just sick of life and I adore outside.
find what your good at. Stick to it, it'll make you happy with yourself and would seek others attention.
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Your situation is really really unbearable, and I don't blame you for being depressed. I could only imagine myself going crazy if I were in your situation, and I'm really proud of you that you were able to hang in there. A 16 year old should not be dealing with so much pain. No one should. You are a really special guy, and you deserve to live a wonderful life. You do not deserve to die! You are struggling in so many areas, and you shouldn't be dealing with this on your own. You should be out there enjoying your life, and having a dedicated girlfriend. If you're 100% sure your girlfriend is cheating on you, you should break up with her. She doesn't deserve to be with you! You should have the best girl out there, someone who will love and respect you no matter what. You need to get help. You'll be a new person! Please e-mail me at alexisgirlie@gmail.com and I can try to find you people in your area who can help you, and help your mom and dad resolve their conflicts. It is very painful to watch parents fight, but if your dad is hitting your mom, I believe someone needs to step in. Start living again! Don't cut your life short! With the right treatment, you will be happy again! Good luck :)
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