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commitment to ex
me and my boyfriend of a year and a half recently broke up. we both would like to be together, but due to the fact that we're in two different worlds right now (hes in college and im in high school) we mutually decided its best for us to be apart, and we're both okay with that. i'm going to the same college as him next year and we will probably get back together eventually, but right now we have both recognized that we're single. he said if i hook up with other people its fine and that he wouldnt hate me and he wouldnt stop loving me blah blah blah all that stuff. i know it would make him upset if i did, but i feel like if were going to be broken up i shouldnt have to feel tied down (but i do). do you think its wrong for me to hook up with other people if theres chances of us getting back together in the future? and if yes, should i/how should i tell him if i do hook up with someone else? and please don't say "oh if you really loved him you wouldnt want to hook up with anyone else!" because at least in my situation that is extremely false. if things with my ex could work out right now, i would not have any interest in anyone else. thanks
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the fact that he is comfortable with you hooking up with other people is defintely different you would think out of love it'd bother him a little? i mean it doesn't bother you he could be hooking up with some hot number at this moment? But i mean it's not like your dating so there is NOTHING wrong with it. Do your thing but keep in mind you got to be careful because someone else could catch feelings in "hooking up" and they could possibly get hurt,
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You can't help what you feel. It's okay to feel tied down, as long as you know (and it sounds like you both do) that that isn't what is happening here.
I think you should be single, and hook up with someone if you want too hook up with that person, regardless of the chances of getting back together with your ex in the future.
I think you should tell your ex IF you do get back together. If you do get back together, it'll be important to be honest about your lives when you were apart (just like it's important to be honest with people about things your past if it's a new relationship). You are broken up right now, and even tho you might want to act like he's your best friend and tell him everything - he isn't your best friend. He's your ex. It's a big difference and you both need to respect that difference.
It might be helpful for the two of you to set some ground rules now about 'not telling', so you both know not to expect the other person to be reporting their romantic activities to you. If you are broken up, neither of you should be doing that. Neither of you deserve to know what the other is up too. Don't ask him if he wants to know, tell him he doesn't get too, and that you know you don't get too either, unless the other person wants too tell. If something is getting more serious, that can be talked about, but don't go creating any rules about reporting, trust him to tell you when he needs to or wants too. You do the same.
Being an ex with someone means 'not knowing'. It's tough, but it's what broken up is.
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well honestly it comes down to whether you would feel comfortable hooking up with someone else or not. and it also goes both ways. if he extends that courtesy to you then you should extend the same courtesy to him. If he doesn't want to hook up with anyone, that's his deal. But you may also have to consider the fact that he may hook up with other girls. If that makes you uneasy then tell him you would like both of you to stay single but committed. If you're all right with that then we're back to where we started: whether you're comfortable or not. As for the way to tell him, I would just ask whether he wants to know or not. If he doesn't, don't worry. If he does, ask him in what way he would like you to tell him. I hope I helped you out! Good Luck!
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