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Best friend of 9 years.
I am 17, female. My best friend is 17 and male. I have known him for nine years, we met in third grade. We were each other's pretty much best friend. I can go to him with anything, I have no problem telling him what I feel I can't say to other's because he will never judge me. He tells me a lot of his problems, too. When I text him upset, he can tell and he asks immediately what is wrong, and vice versa. He struggles with very low confidence because he has a brother who, in his eyes, is perfect and he can't measure up. So, I have to pretty much tell him everyday how great he really is or else he would get upset. He sings and plays guitar, he knows I love his singing voice, so when I ask, he sings for me. We are going to Europe for a music trip in three weeks together and my science teacher is being the biggest douschebag, while my friend is in AP Physics and I am in Chemistry, I had asked him if he could help me get ahead in Chem so I wouldn't be behind when we get back, he said he can try and we stayed after for 2 hours going over Chemistry work, after everything was finished he asked if I understood and I replied that I was so, so. He went over more things with me to help me better understand and he promised we won't leave until I am pro at Chemistry, even though his dad was home from the UK after being away for 2 weeks, he still stayed with me and drove me home after. My friends all say he loves me, his friends say I love him. I think we are both just great friends. A random person came up to me in the hallway after my friend put a cat sticker on my locker and gave me my favorite flavor jolly rancher and said "God, just date already, oh wait, everybody knows you two love each other except you two." Again, we think we are great friends. I reinforced that idea to everybody today when about 12 people felt the need to tell me he was with another girl at a music festival. When I asked my friend about it, jokingly, he didn't give me a straight forward answer which gave everybody reason to again, believe that he is "trying to make me jealous" or he realized he "cant be with me so he's 'settling'"
From an outsider, what do you think? Are we just friends? Thanks! Sorry if it's unorganized and the ideas are everywhere, I just typed what I thought. Thanks again!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Clear the air. Have a DTR (Define The Relationship) with him. Ask: Do we have feelings for each other?
Look each other in the eyes when you ask it. If you both well up inside, it was meant to be. If neither of you well up inside, the answer is NO. If one of you wells up inside and the other does not, there is some work to do on the friendship, because one of you is going to end up hurt someday.
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Well if you don't have any feelings for him then don't let people bother you with that. People assume anything. Your friend might like you but who knows, he might just feel the same as you and you guys might just be comfortable with each other and only see each other as friends. Don't worry about it if you don't like him like that.
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so you don't have feelings toward him i am assuming? well... the problem with this equation is everyone assumes that when girls and guys are friends they aren't... "friends" even no matter how much you protest it. But when people say that don't let it bother you that can actually distance your friendship... but also from what it seems he might like you... i'm not going to lie. avoiding talking about hanging out with another girl is a sign of that but then again he could have avoided it because he might think YOU like him... just sit down and talk about it.
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