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my mom treats me bad?
So the last week my mom hasn't been home. She's been staying with her mother in the hospital. She finally came home last night for a little bit, and I ran her some hot bath water, made her coffee for her, and everything.
I get off of work at 2 I've been getting up at 6 to take my 7 year old brother to school, and than I have college at 8.
I've been exhausted, but I've been doing it for her.
Well she came home last night, and she ran and was giving my brother hugs and kisses and saying how much she's missed him;
but here I am, all excited to see her, and she pushes me to the side, literally, and goes to him. I'm thinking, 'where is my hug? why aren't you excited to see me?"
Than today I cancelled one of my classes to come home to meet my mom to go with her to see my nana, and she was asleep, woke up at 11:30 and was like, you wanna go wtih me, and I was like yeah, thats why I left school early; she didn't approve of my outfit, said it wasn't appropriate. I was in a joggin suit, just like she wore, but my hair was pulled up;
so I went to go change, and put on some tenny shoes, and she left with out me. Said she don't have time to waste on me?
I just really wanted to see my nana, and I haven't been able to because they won't let me drive that far;
I just don't get her. Why does she treat me so differently? My brother always comes first. I may be older, but I like love and affection too?
Than Crimson (my brother) asked her if I died, would she be upset, and she goes 'i guess'. And than he asked if he died, would she be upset, and she said "Yeah, I don't thinkI could deal with losing you"
:(
I do everything for her! I dn't get a thank you or nothing! I've tried talking to her about it, and she said that i need to get over it, and stop being selfish. Selfish for just wanting attentin for my parents?
right.
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I wish I had a good answer for you, I don't as one doesn't exist for why your mother treats you this way. The only thing I can tell you as someone old enough to be your grandparent is that parents for some reason treat each child differently.
I for instance I was abused most of my life by my father, abuse similar to what you are seeing from your mom. It was not physical abuse it was mental abuse. Why? What did I do wrong to cause him to abuse me? I was born. I happened to come along at a time in his life when he was not prepared to be a parent. The war had just ended, he and my mother married during the war. He had plans that did not include children at that time. Those plans changed when my mom became pregnant.
Unlike my sister who my mother became pregnant with at his choosing, I bore the brunt of his anger anytime something went wrong. His way of showing his displeasure with me was not to speak to me until I apologised for what ever he thought the transgression was. It mattered not whether I was responsible I had to apologize. He died without us speaking for the last 10 years of his life.
I tell you this not to say this is what your mothers problem, but to show you that some parents treat each child differently. Your mom may feel that as a college age student, a young adult;that showing love and affection is inappropriate.
If running baths for your mother and making her coffee, taking care of your brother is being done to earn your mothers affection? Then maybe you should consider letting mom fend for herself on some of these issues. Taking care of your brother is an issue I think you need to continue if he is to young to care for himself.
You can't buy affection which is what it seems you are trying to do. If you stop doing all these things for mom maybe she will realize what a gem of a daughter you really are?
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It's not right that your mother is neglecting you but your old enough to deal with this. You do know you don't have to go out of your way to please her; stop with the coffee the baths and everything extra you do for her because with the way things are going now nothings going to change (she's still going to treat you like shit).
You have enough things to deal with, which I can completely relate to ( I work everyday and go to college as well). I wouldn't put myself through what you are, as if we don't have enough stuff to deal with
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