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How to let him go


Question Posted Sunday December 25 2011, 5:53 pm

last night my bf sent me to hell on the phone,we had an argument and he just hung up on me,I spent the whole night crying,What can I do????

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AdviceMistress answered Monday December 26 2011, 7:05 pm:
Give him some space and sometime to cool off. As girls we like to fix the problem and find a solution then are there. For guys they need their space to think. This also a great time for you to reflect and think about what you said. You can only speak for yourself. Wait for him to come to you and than apologize for your part of the fight. It's best in relationships to tell the truth and how you're really feeling. I hope it all works out!

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Spirit answered Monday December 26 2011, 2:37 am:
Hey there. Every relationship has its ups and downs, high points and low points. But I guess what makes it strong is your sticking together and working together towards a solution.

Firstly, I would suggest you CHEER UP. Feeling good and appreciating him and moments spent together. Then, find out what went wrong. What was the argument about? What is the root of the problem? It may be a misunderstanding/ insecurity/ or something else.

Second, give it time. A day, or two, till you both calm down.

Third, let go of your ego and think over where you went wrong, what this means is what you think you did that your conscious will never approve and your guy wouldn't like.

Fourth, be positive in your approach. If you are not feeling good and optimistic towards working out a solution, then it never will. Use the power of your mind and make it happen, by being positive.

Fifth, do not think about who was right and who was wrong because trust me, there are no absolutes. If you really want to make up, acknowledge what you think you did that he didn't like, and LEARN from it. Learning from an argument, or ''negative'' events will help you rebuild your relationship and take it to new heights.

Sixth, now tell him sweetly and politely and precisely what your feelings are about the problem. U got to take the initiative, if he doesn't talk politely, you should, if you want to stick to this guy. While talking, tell him that you love him and want to be together and how you appreciate it.

Seventh, recognize that here no one is a winner in the argument. It's just about who will fix it first by apologizing and showing humility.

Lastly, communicate freely about it and do not repress any of your feelings, because chances are, it might explode again, in a way you won't like and won't be good. Then, give HIM time, to think about it.

Now, if he is not understanding your problem, and still being violent, I suggest, DUMP him. He is not worth it, people who are understanding and appreciative and easy going are the best to be around and stay with. Negative people shouldn't be a part of your life for your own sake.

I hope it helped a little.

Cheer up and be POSITIVE. IT WILL work out.

Good luck :)

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xChaos answered Sunday December 25 2011, 8:23 pm:
Things like this happen from time to time in relationships. Sometimes pent up frustration and little things can build up until you explode and take it out on your significant other.

I suggest you take a step back and spend a few days calming down and thinking about whether or not you want to be with him. What are the pros about leaving him? What are the cons? What are the good things about him and what are the bads? If the bad things outweigh the good things, its probably best to let him go. Staying with him will only make things worse in the long run, and keep you from being truly happy.

Time is a great healer. After a while you wont feel so bad about being without him anymore, especially if you weren't happy in your relationship. There are probably other guys out there who will love you more and treat you better anyway.

Good luck.

xChaos

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