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Proposing? Engaged? Marriage?
Hi! I'm 18/f & my boyfriend is 18/m; We have been together for a year, but it feels like so much longer. I'm in college, studying to be a NeoNatal Nurse; My boyfriend's mom left him homeless as soon as he turned 18, therefore he has been living with my parents and I since August.
Riley & I have both agreed that we shouldn't get married until I am done with college and have a stable job. I know we haven't been together long, but since we have been faced with a lot of adult problems, it seems like we work together well, and we have been together for years. I wouldn't mind if he proposed to me, because getting engaged doesn't mean you have to get married immediately. Right? My dad told him when he moved in, that he has 6 months to save up money from his job, and get his own place. So he moves out on Feb. 14th. He is really wanting me to move in with him; and I would, but the economy is so bad, I'd rather stay with my parents, because its free, and focuse on school and not have to worry about a job right now since I'm dealing with the toughest classes of the career at this moment.
But, what I'm trying to get at is, Riley says he doesn't want to get engaged until 3 or 4 more years, but he says that he knows I'm the one he will be with for the rest of his life. But why wait that long, if he supposively knows I the one for him? I'm not rushing him at all. I respect his decision; I'd rather him do it when he feels it right, instead of rushing, and regretting.
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The time isn't right.
Youa re going to school and he is moving in to hsi own place and he needs to get situated. What's an engagement going to do? You are with him right now isn't that enough? I also thinkeve 3 to 4 years is to soon. You have your 20s ahead of you why would you want to be married by your 20s? I can see late 20s early 30s but your early 20s?
You need to think about finishing school and getting a job so you can support yourself and be stable. Think and live in the now. Right now you are together and happy, yes? Why do you need a ring then?
Take it easy and worry about the important things. It'll happen when it's suppose to happen!
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You both are young, Right now he may feel like you are the one but you also should know that if it was meant to be then what is the rush? A year is not long and despite someone feeling someone is the one for them anything can happen, Nobody truly knows if someone is their lifetime partner. You are right, The economy is really bad and this is exactly why I would wait. Enjoy one another's relationship for now and when you are done with College then see where you both are. You wouldn't want to become engaged and then have something happen in the course of 3-4 years. Sure, Nobody needs to get married right after engagement but at the same time you should have a plan to how long it will be before you marry as a few years being engaged can be a drag depending on exactly how long it is. I wouldn't even be talking about marriage until you both know that you can afford it and have a steady place of your own. Your boyfriend hasn't even moved out on his own yet, Wait and see if he is able to get his own place and then see if he can handle the finances afterward. Ride it out a few years and then see where it takes you because the last thing you want to do is be engaged when you still live at home with your parents. Getting engaged now will put a ton of stress on your relationship.
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Hey,
Engagement can be a big mental move for guys, even when they're madly in love. You and Riley sound as if you two have a nice thing going. Maybe the two of you can come to a consensus as far as a good engagement season. Emphasize to him that engagement does not mean marriage is in the immediate future. Maybe you two can agree on a good engagement time that works for both of you. Being that he wants you to move in with him, he's more than likely sincerely dedicated to you. I think you're making the right move by taking you alls financial status quo into consideration. It can all be worked out and understood with a good heart to heart.
Hope I helped =)
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