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Should I give him a chance?
Sarah, female, 23 yrs old
There is a friend that I have known for two years. We started working together and became fast friends. He is a really silly guy and always cracked jokes to make our time at work fun. The thing is, eventually, he started cracking jokes about us being a real couple one day. I didn't take it seriously and just brushed it off. Surprisingly, these jokes didn't stop. He kept this going on for almost an entire year. After people began to ask questions about the nature of our relationship, I started to wonder if he was really being serious. I wasn't too worried about it and figured even if he did like me, he would never have the guts to actually tell me. To my surprise, almost a year after wondering if he really liked me, he asked me out. We were standing outside after work when he asked me. I so shocked and caught off guard that I just looked at him and said, "Well... you're a really good friend". He seemed sad after I said this and looked down at the floor. It was unexpected and I wasn't sure what to say, I just said whatever came to my mind. It's not that I don't like him but I realized early on that he was not the usual type I go for. Even though I love funny guys, I've never gone out with someone as silly as him. I have flirted with him in the past just for fun and he with me, but I never thought it would turn into something complicated. But after that incident I started thinking about what happened and questioned if I should actually give him a chance. He is a funny, sweet, caring, charismatic person and I enjoy spending time with him. He is NOT the typical guy go I for but dating only my type hasn't exactly been a positive experience for me. I've been wondering lately if I should give him a chance and just throw the type thing out of the window. I do like him and care alot about him and do see many qualities that I want in a boyfriend in him. But I worry about crossing that line and destroying my friendship with him by pursuing a relationship with him that might fail. I don't want to lose a good friend but at the same time, I'm scared that if I don't give him a chance I might miss out on a great guy. What should I do? Should I pursue something with him or not even take a chance? Please help!
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It actually seems like you want to be with him. The one thing you're actually worried about is ruining the friendship but also possibly missing out on something great. If I were you, I'd take the chance. You also said he has qualities you're looking for in a boyfriend so that's a plus. Types don't really matter. You are into him at least a little bit. You even said your type of guy hasn't been a positive experience so taking a chance might just be worth the risk.
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Hey,
Sarah, I think you've answered your own question in the midst of asking it. You've said more and more positive things about this guy, and you seem to really have a thing for him secretly. A plus would be the fact that he has been a friend for a while, so you know him pretty well already. Now sure, pursuing something as more than friends is taking a chance, but who says it has to ruin you twos relationship? Don't rush it. Take it slow, but give it a chance. Seems as if the two of you are smitten with one another. Also, as far as "your type" goes, there's absolutely nothing wrong with stepping out of your comfort zone, and if you haven't gotten good results in your comfort zone before, it sounds like stepping out of it would be the best thing for you to do. I say go for this. Take things slow, but definitely go for it. I'm excited with what may come about in this match up. If you decide to go for it, please try to let me know how thngs go!
Hope I helped =)
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