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Is he interested me? Should I tell him how I feel?
20/F
I overanalyze a lot so I need your help!
Being in college, I wanted to stay single and I haven't really dated anyone within the past couple of years. However, last semester (around February) I met this guy and we hit it off completely. EVERYONE (even his friends) was telling us we should date, we looked cute together, etc and I think this fueled my feelings for him. However, he NEVER made a move. Granted, I'm not the type of college girl to just hook up with random guys (everyone knows that) so he might have felt uncomfortable...but still, I thought I was being pretty obvious. I would do really flirty things and he still wouldn't make a move. I took him to my sorority formal and again, STILL no moves except he was doing super cute things like massaging my shoulder and caressing my neck, etc. Another night, he did try to cuddle with me at one point but then I freaked out about something else (long irrelevant story) so he freaked out too and stopped.
Over the summer, I took some time to find myself and along the way, forced myself to get over him. I literally transformed myself both inside and outside. I lost a lot of my college weight, gained more confidence, and became 20x more outgoing than I originally was (which was still pretty outgoing). I literally did not talk to him for 2 months, which was weird because we were best friends. The first night I saw him (about a month ago), I had drank a lot and someone told me that I told him I liked him...although I don't remember this, he still didn't make a move on me. I even asked him to walk me home (not being seductive, I just wanted to walk home with someone) and he walked his own way home.
Frustrated, I decided that THAT was it, I was done. But my feelings are slowly returning, and lately I feel that he returns these feelings. He texts me and talks to me all the time now (him initiating the talk) which would not be new for me last year, but is strange for me this year since we haven't talked much lately. Every time I go to a party and he's there, he immediately comes and hangs out with me, usually for the whole night. The last time was when I felt confused. We have this ongoing thing where we're slightly mean to each other. He's in a fraternity, and I kissed one of his pledges on the cheek, an innocent peck because he said something nice. He freaked out and started telling everyone I made out with a pledge (jokingly). My best friend said to him, "You're only joking about this because you're jealous" to which he replied, "Yeah...I am jealous." We went on a walk and talked about random things, and then he had to leave the party because he had an early class. He immediately texted me: ":( I'm going to be real nice from now on. Promise." and then kept responding with cute things and smiley faces.
This past party, I SWEAR I could tell he wanted to kiss me but he never followed through. We were alone at the back of his fraternity just talking and he kept coming close and then backing away. I got really nervous but again, no follow through.
Is he just shy, or uninterested?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
is he gay?
is he on some frat order NOT to move on you - this would be the ultimate power game for the frat boss.
is he hyper sensitive - depending on his age group and exactly where he lives he might have had such an ear bashing about NOT raping girls ect that he is just avoiding it all. I went through a stage were I would not have sex with a girl unless she said in front of somone I knew that she wanted to have sex. Literaly word for word point blank.
he might be embarressed that he is gonna cum to quick et etc etc
make this move; invite him to the beach / to watch a movie. Offer him a massage. give him a massage with NO funny business. Then let him massage you. As he massages you, you can make nice noises and you can move towards his hands, you can be very liberal with what you do or don't wear. you just need to say ''yeah that feel REAL nice - don't be shy we are both grown ups'' a couple of times.
90% succes rate.
Back up plan; after the massage you need a shower right, to wash of the massage oil - invite him to wash you back.
99% success rate.
If that does not work - repeate twice a week and repost progress good luck :)
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You have nothing to lose by telling him your feelings. If he doesn't like you is there really that much emotion involved, he's a friend and you actually managed to stop talking to him once.
Everyone has different ways of showing that they're interested in people, so it's hard to tell because none of us on advicenators.com know him. I can tell that he definitely likes talking to you though, and being in your company.
Just tell him how you feel and good luck :).
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