Member Since: February 28, 2013
Answers: 5
Last Update: February 28, 2013
Visitors: 711
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20/F
I overanalyze a lot so I need your help!
Being in college, I wanted to stay single and I haven't really dated anyone within the past couple of years. However, last semester (around February) I met this guy and we hit it off completely. EVERYONE (even his friends) was telling us we should date, we looked cute together, etc and I think this fueled my feelings for him. However, he NEVER made a move. Granted, I'm not the type of college girl to just hook up with random guys (everyone knows that) so he might have felt uncomfortable...but still, I thought I was being pretty obvious. I would do really flirty things and he still wouldn't make a move. I took him to my sorority formal and again, STILL no moves except he was doing super cute things like massaging my shoulder and caressing my neck, etc. Another night, he did try to cuddle with me at one point but then I freaked out about something else (long irrelevant story) so he freaked out too and stopped.
Over the summer, I took some time to find myself and along the way, forced myself to get over him. I literally transformed myself both inside and outside. I lost a lot of my college weight, gained more confidence, and became 20x more outgoing than I originally was (which was still pretty outgoing). I literally did not talk to him for 2 months, which was weird because we were best friends. The first night I saw him (about a month ago), I had drank a lot and someone told me that I told him I liked him...although I don't remember this, he still didn't make a move on me. I even asked him to walk me home (not being seductive, I just wanted to walk home with someone) and he walked his own way home.
Frustrated, I decided that THAT was it, I was done. But my feelings are slowly returning, and lately I feel that he returns these feelings. He texts me and talks to me all the time now (him initiating the talk) which would not be new for me last year, but is strange for me this year since we haven't talked much lately. Every time I go to a party and he's there, he immediately comes and hangs out with me, usually for the whole night. The last time was when I felt confused. We have this ongoing thing where we're slightly mean to each other. He's in a fraternity, and I kissed one of his pledges on the cheek, an innocent peck because he said something nice. He freaked out and started telling everyone I made out with a pledge (jokingly). My best friend said to him, "You're only joking about this because you're jealous" to which he replied, "Yeah...I am jealous." We went on a walk and talked about random things, and then he had to leave the party because he had an early class. He immediately texted me: ":( I'm going to be real nice from now on. Promise." and then kept responding with cute things and smiley faces.
This past party, I SWEAR I could tell he wanted to kiss me but he never followed through. We were alone at the back of his fraternity just talking and he kept coming close and then backing away. I got really nervous but again, no follow through.
Is he just shy, or uninterested?
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is he gay?
is he on some frat order NOT to move on you - this would be the ultimate power game for the frat boss.
is he hyper sensitive - depending on his age group and exactly where he lives he might have had such an ear bashing about NOT raping girls ect that he is just avoiding it all. I went through a stage were I would not have sex with a girl unless she said in front of somone I knew that she wanted to have sex. Literaly word for word point blank.
he might be embarressed that he is gonna cum to quick et etc etc
make this move; invite him to the beach / to watch a movie. Offer him a massage. give him a massage with NO funny business. Then let him massage you. As he massages you, you can make nice noises and you can move towards his hands, you can be very liberal with what you do or don't wear. you just need to say ''yeah that feel REAL nice - don't be shy we are both grown ups'' a couple of times.
90% succes rate.
Back up plan; after the massage you need a shower right, to wash of the massage oil - invite him to wash you back.
99% success rate.
If that does not work - repeate twice a week and repost progress good luck :)
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Okie this is really embrassing but how do u make a guy cme faster when we have sex my bf tkes like 20 min to cum which idk but i havent got him to cum when i give him a blowjob i mean after a while my neck and mouth hurt and i want to make him cum faster how i have tried nibbling using my teeth putting ice in my mouth nothing worked i need help fast!!! (link)
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Ok girls here is the big secret to not only helping your guy cum but owning him.
Just think abou the dynamics in his life. The dynamics in your relationship and make a list of all his possible kinks then check them off one by one.
I had a mate who would melt as soon as his GF put her hair in pony tails. Sometimes she would walk around the house making a whole production of it - walking around in a towel and talking about puting her hair up and calling her freinds and asking them about hair. he would blow very quickly.
Remeber hiskink may change from time to time. And it will turn him on if he is thinking he is filling your kink too. I had a GF who used to complain that i did not 'honey her up' I took about two years to figure this out she ment; Such up to me, ask me for sex, beg me for sex then ''take her'' ''against her will''. She wanted me to ''force'' her and she wanted me to ''force her'' to talk about it. It wasn't really my thing but it made me hot to think that I was meating her needs.
You probaly know if he is a talking / feeling or looking guy. for example if he is a looking / visual person take a picture of your lips and send it to him with a cheekyk text. Send it as soon as he gets to work so he is thinking about it all day.
I call this stuff ''brand management''. Manage your brand girls.
Be a bit outragouse. What guy does not want to get the following message ''I am talking to the girl at the lingere shop about if she wants to join us in a three some I have to get back to you. just going to try somthing on :)'' That is how you get a guy ''pre loaded''.
Tell him a story ( it is OK to make it up) sometimes when I am not really in the mood my GF tells me about her first time (which is actually a really sweet story) but she tells me about how she FELT with this older guy and his cock being so bigg and it was her first time and she was so sweet and........... point is tell a story.
Last but not least is he on drugs?? he might be taking a quick somthing to last so long to try to please you..
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how can my boyfriend make it not hurt for the first time. are the myths true about how some girls poop during anal sex.
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1.0 Decide if you really are emotionally open to him.
2.0 If your of legal age have a couple of drinks.
3.0 RELAX
4.0 Obviously have a poo before.
5.0 Use lube.
6.0 Let him start with a finger.
7.0 A mans penis (strangly) is designed / shaped to remove other mens semen from your vagina.
8.0 If you use too much lube and play around too long he may remove some poo.
9.0 Generally his penis won't be long enoug to reach the poo (insert biology class)
10. If a little poo comes out don't be embarresed if he wants to play ther he is going to have to risk it.
11.0 I think it is 99% emotional he wants to check you comitment to him.
12.0 I suggest doing it face to face make eye contact and SMILE.
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i've recntly had sex (with a condom) and anal with my boyfriend on different occasions.but my mum told me not to rush but the timing was right and i wanted to. should i tell her? im'm 16 and he's 19. (link)
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Good on you for using a condom. Good on you for trying anal. You can't be any more open and comited to you boyfriend that doing anal. he knows that your not designed to get that much pleasure from anal. Thus he knows you showing that you love him and are emotionaly and literally open to him. I hope you did it face to face so you could look him in the eye and I hope you smiled just a bit. Most of all I hope he was gentle. Yes tell your mum. I might feel odd but in the long run you need a sounding board.
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19/f
For some reason, I LOVE being dominated in bed. I like handcuffs, being choked, whips you name it. But outside the bedroom i'm a completely different person. I'm normally on schedule with my daily routines, shower, study for school because I want to be a nurse. Sometimes when my boyfriend and I don't have sex I get really uneasy and tense as well. I don't know why i'm so horny all the time. If I don't orgasm I actually get sort of angry. It makes me think about having sex with this guy I never been with before and I envision him dominating me because I didn't orgasm. It's not that he's bad in bed I just don't cum as quickly as he does. I've been with my boyfriend and ONLY him for about 1 year and a half. What's the psychology behind me wanting to be dominated thing? If i'm thinking about other guys sexually, is it time that I take a break? So confused. (link)
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I agree you are a normal 19YO girl. I suggest you make a list of all the normal, respectfull, clean and decent 35-40 yo guys you know. Pick ONE tell him about your issues and ask if he can help you out form time to time. In the long run you are much better of with a safety valve to let out your extra tension then arguing with you BF. 19YO boys can not meet all the needs of 19YO girls.
I will get howled down for this answere as it does not conform to social norms. Social norms end in tears, divorce and worse. Just listen to your body, be descrete and ask nicley.
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