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My friend needs help.
I have a really close friend who I've known for two years. Shes like a sister to me. I'm involved in a lot of the same activities as her, and we have a ton in common. Shes adorable, one of the funniest people I know, and just generally seems to be happily enjoying life.
About a year ago, she started cutting herself. I didn't know about it till she started cutting her legs. I confronted her about it one night and she broke down and told me. She thinks the world is so horrible and corrupt and that life has no meaning, and that shes an awful, disgusting person who would be better off dead.
Her cuts are riduculously bad. She doesn't just cut her wrists. She has huge cuts on her legs (giant scabs)and long cuts around her thighs. She also carved die into her thigh. She has 25 or so cuts on her stomach. Her wrists are cut to the point where they're starting to look like big scabs. She has big scabs on her hands from cutting pieces of skin off. She has huge slits on both of her shoulders too. She uses this gigantic butcher knife.
Her parents found out, along with her band instructor and pretty much everyone shes friends with. Her parents haven't done a thing about it all except sit there and cry about it. Shes starting to talk to me about suicide. I've been trying to convince her to not do it, but I don't think I'm gettting anywhere.
She needs some sort of other help, and fast. I don't wanna see this beautiful, talented girl who I love more than my own siblings end it.
What do I do?
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In the U.S. in most areas school has already started or about to start this week. You could start by informing school authorities such as the school principal. I'm surprised her band instructor did not take a more active role when he/she found out.
If the school principal does not take a more active role such as reporting her problem to social services then ask your parents to contact the police. Make sure you tell your principal that her parents are aware of her cutting.
If her parents are aware of her cutting and do nothing about this other than wring there hands over this; then they are in a sense committing child abuse. Every school system has a policy for handling child abuse. Informing your school principal or a trusted teacher should kick that policy into action.
I must add that I am very proud of you for watching out for your friend. She has a serious problem, one that would send most friends running away from her. Be aware that your trying to get help for her may at first cause her to be angry with you. Better she be angry than dead. With the right kind of help she will get over her anger and you two will be friends again. A friendship that should last a lifetime. Hopefully a very long lifetime for both of you.
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I completely agree with the previous answer. Your friend is at a point where she is resorting to horrendous extents of self-mutilation and considering suicide, and at this point she needs to see a professional that can understand what's going on and decide how she can be helped.
I'm not sure where you live, but if you don't know who to go to, you could try your doctor. Ask them if they can refer you to a psychiatrist or an agency, and also ask them what you should do to help your friend. There are also depression and mental health agencies that you should find online if you search "depression help" or something like that. I just looked up "depression help" and an Australian helpline (I'm Australian) came up on the screen. Try calling these places and asking what you can do for your friend. If all of these fail, follow the advice of the previous answer and call social services.
If she does have to go into constant care, remember to visit her regularly and talk to her. Tell her how much you care about her and how much you love her as much as you can. The fact that she tells you about things like contemplating suicide and her cuts, from my experiences with other people, means that she does want help and is trying to reach out for it as best she can. It might seem like she's not listening to you, but don't ever stop telling her what you're saying now. Her problems are psychological; it's not that she doesn't care what you say or doesn't want to listen, it's because she can't seem to see it where she is right now.
You are such an amazing friend for caring so much about this girl and doing everything you can to help her. I sincerely hope that she is able to find some professional help that will get her back to her healthy, happy self.
Edit: I also had this other idea, that you could ask her to call you every time she thinks of cutting or thinks of suicide. Still call professionals to help her out, but this could be good for rehabilitation. I know it's a lot to ask, but always be there for her in a heartbeat if she needs someone (which from what I read I think you're already doing). You're her rock, and even if she hates you for trying to help her, never let her forget that you're her support unit and will always be.
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If you've tried talking to her and nothing culminates from it, you NEED to get authorities involved. I know it sounds so severe, but you need to contact Social Services (CPS). If her parents aren't doing anything proactive to help her, YOU need to. Social Services will get involved, and will make positive steps to help rectify the situation. Like I said, it sounds completely severe - but it could save her life. If it was me, I'd rather my friend be angry with me and alive, then happy with me and dead.
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