my boyfriend and i have been together for a year and we've had alot of "trust issues' eventually i found out that he was cheating on me with another girl so of course i confronted him about it, but he denied the whole thing and said he just firted with her he then confessed everything he ever did during the course of our relationship, he says that he just flirted with girls but i don't believe that this is true, he said that the only reason he did this was because he found out i was flirting with other guys behind his back, but he also cheated before he found out about this, i know it was wrong of me to flirt with other guys but i thought we looked past that but it seems we didn't because he told me that he "got close" with one of his friends too, i guess the reason i'm still with him is because he confessed everything and we could start again, but i'm still uncertain, what if he does it again? i love him so much but i don't trust him at all please help me
YoungMommy answered Tuesday July 5 2011, 9:41 pm: I know you love him and care about him but a relationship without trust is not going to last... he can always earn your trust back but he is going to have to put a lot of effort into it... I cant tell you if he is telling the truth or not because I am not him and I didnt witness anything... But you also have to work on earning his trust, because you flirted too... In my relationship harmless flirting means nothing I know that my man only wans me and he knows that all I want is him...We trust eachother...
Talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you feel and that you are afraid it may happen again... see if he wants to try to earn your trust and let you earn his in return, or if its best to just let go and moce on....
If you do decide to work it out some good advice for you... In detail tell him how bad it hurt when he did the things he did... tell him exactly how you feel and get it all out right then and there, then forgive him... and let it go, dont ever bring it up again... a lot of people hold their feelings in and dont tell people how they felt about what someone did to them and it build up until a while down the road you explode and your yelling at your boyfriend for something you forgave him for a long time ago... dont do that, get it all out now, forgive him, and never mention it again... if you keep bringing up the past it will hurt the present and ruin the future... good luck and best wishes [ YoungMommy's advice column | Ask YoungMommy A Question ]
dimplez answered Tuesday July 5 2011, 5:15 pm: the reason why you feel this way is because you probably thinks he is telling you the truth but dont know but you know what people say if he did it once he will do it again to you or whoever that he did it with [ dimplez's advice column | Ask dimplez A Question ]
kristamikele answered Tuesday July 5 2011, 3:35 pm: In my experience, when people (male or female) give a big "confession," it is usually because you are close to finding something out, so they orchestrate some moving tell all to come out ahead of it. This is not to say that your boyfriend is not being sincere, but if he is, he is one in a thousand, because most of the time, it's a runaround...he's backed into the corner. I would think the thing that is making you think he's telling the truth is because he has admitted more than he had to by telling you he has gotten "close" with another girl, but I would bet if you scratched the surface on the girl he's talking about, you will find that they have more than "gotten close." Typically, people who cheat try to turn it around on the other person. He is telling you he only flirted because he heard you flirted with other people, but wait a minute...didn't you just hear about him and some other people? Did that information make you go out and seek revenge by doing it too? No; you went and confronted him about it, which is what any person would do if they heard something about their partner. I can't tell you what to do...plenty of people (again, male and female) stay with someone after they have cheated, and sometimes it even works, but you gotta at least be honest with yourself--chances are, if you feel like there's something going on, than there's something going on.
Only you can decide what to do from here, but give your own inner feelings more trust than you give what comes out of his mouth right now. [ kristamikele's advice column | Ask kristamikele A Question ]
melissa123 answered Tuesday July 5 2011, 10:29 am: well if he's doing all of these things to you, then maybe it isn't a good idea to stick with him. because theres a good chance of him to keep hurting you. i don't think a guy that is so much into a girl would do something like that!
in my opinion i would talk to him seriously and tell him how you feel and maybe give him one more chance. maybe stop texting him or something for awhile and see if he comes to you!
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