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Need to Clear things up but don't know how?
Ok, so here is the story. My ex boyfriend and I met when we were 16 and now we are 20. A lot of stuff has gone on during that period of time. it's been one of those things that has been i love him one minute and the next I'm really angry. In my younger days, I did some immature things. But, nothing more than "silly girl" stuff, like a prank call or something stupid like that. I was a teenager back then. I would never do something like that now. He has a girlfriend and I am ready to move on with my life too. That ship has sailed. I understand that we can't be "friends" because of the romance that we had and because of the bad stuff that has happened. But, I expected us to be civilized. So, in my mind, I've been wondering... something must have happened. He can't POSSIBLY be that upset about one or two prank calls to the point where we can't be civilized and he looks at me like he hates me. So, I did my investigations and found out that my best friend, whose been my best friend since like we were little, framed me!
She would call him and tell him things about me that weren't true (like that I hated his family, she told him I was hooking up with girls, that I was hooking up with his entire fraternity, and to top off the lie, she told him I was hooking up with her)! There is a guy who she knows, who everyone knows is trouble, and she was hooking up with him and talking about my relationship with my ex. It turns out that guy knew him and would help her with her schemes. Everything that she said was not true. She also framed me by leaving things on his car and pretending it was me by saying "things I would only know," which she knew because she was my best friend. She also left nasty messages to his girlfriend, once again, pretending it was me. I would NEVER do something like that. EVER! So why would she do this?
Well, one of her friends confessed everything to me. She said that she was secretly bisexual and that she had been in love with me for years. I know that this is true because my school confirmed that these mysterious love notes that were coming through e-mail were from her computer. I am completely hetrosexual and would not hook up with a girl if they paid me. I would find that disgusting. Being it that my ex boyfriend and myself are very religious, he found this disgusting. He probably also didn't like the fact that "I" was leaving nasty messages to his girlfriend.
Ever since, I've disaffiliated myself from my "friend." I blocked her from seeing my wall on facebook and I don't meet with her for lunch at school or anything like that. She is obviously crazy. I have kept secrets for her, like the fact that she was cheating on her boyfriend, that she had gotten an abortion, and that she would sneak out of her window at night in high school to go off with guys. I didn't think they were very moral things. In fact, I am against all three! But, I still kept the secrets for her. These aren't things you do for people who are close to you. I am heartbroken. more than I am about my ex, because I really trusted her.
Now that I have learned my lesson, I would like to make peace with my ex, and with his girlfriend, being it that I may be in her sorority this year. I didn't do anything to her. It's not like I can be her best friend because that's awkward and she's with someone who I really cared for. But, I'd like to be on good terms with her if we are going to be doing things together. Even if I end up in another sorority, I can't stand her looking at me with angry eyes, when I didn't do anything. But, it's awkward to just go up to them and tell them what happened. Who would believe me? They might just ask how I knew about those things and won't believe me when I say someone told me. I just want to make peace. And I don't want to be known as a psycho when I've actually been moving on with my life and leaving his entire relationship alone.I have my own issues and my own responsibilities to be worried about that. I feel like I've really grown and I left that behind. But, I can't handle this tension when we are all in the same university.
Help!
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Well first I want to say I am sorry that you were hurt by your best friend. I myself have never been in a situation like this but if it were me I would first confront the friend and try to get her to come forward with the truth to the ex. If that doesnt workd I would then just go up to the or write a letter if It felt to weird, and explain what had happened and tell them the truth apologise for the confusion and hope that they understand. If they dont want to hear it or believe it then atleast you tried to make peace. But maybe they will understand and you can feel better about the whole situation and not get the dirty looks anymore. Good luck and I hope I helped!
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