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My Sister's Scary Obsession
Me: 16/F.
My sister: 14/F
Last year, my sister attempted suicide and a couple months ago, she was planning another attempt, but it failed. She's on medication and we're trying to get her involved in more things to keep her busy, since before she did nothing, but sit around and complain. Recently, she's come across this boy at our school, we'll just call him J. Well, J is a senior in high school and he's one of those guys who works out constantly because he seems to have a low self-esteem. He's pretty friendly, but he doesn't trust people right away. So, my sister started to message him on facebook to start being friends with him and he seemed eager to meet her at first, but she started acting weird. By this, she always asked him what he was up to and if he one-worded her, she'd get snippy and demand why he didn't want to talk to her and when they met at school, she refused to talk to him because she's so shy, no matter how much he tried to get her to talk.
So he kind of gave up trying to be friends with her, but my sister didn't. She kept pushing and messaging him and then he ended up going out with another girl and my sister was furious. She started insulting him and getting nasty with him and when I told her to stop, he wasn't going to like her if she did that, she told me to shut up and that she wasn't doing anything wrong. So I did, but I also sent an apology message to J about all the drama she's stirring up with him. This happened about a month ago or so and now she's literally stalking him, she watches him all the time at school and she's always demanding that I check his facebook, since she deleted him from her friends list out of anger. And this is really aggravating me because this poor guy isn't getting a break and now my sister has gotten her friend in on this obsession, so it's all I hear about. This is extremely unhealthy, it has to be. And not to mention, really creepy. Her therapist probably doesn't even know about it and my mom doesn't do a thing about it, just shrugs it off. I really want my sister to stop this crazy obsession. Is there anything I can do, or try to do? Any other help I can get for her?
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So call the therapist and tell her.
I fear, though, that at some point this will become a legal matter. Your mom is delusional as to the extent of her mental illness. I feel for your family and the guy who she has her crosshairs on. This is not going to be a fun ride.
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If her therapist doesn't know about this.. well thats dangerous. Try to contact her therapist and tell her immediately! If you dont know how to contact her, ask your mom.
It sounds like she needs something else to take her mind off of him. First of all, take your computer and hide it. Probably not in your house since she could find it. Ask one of your friends (someone that is not friends with your sister) and ask them to take your computer. If its not a mobile computer, try unplugging it or something to make it not work. I know it seems silly, but if the computer is broken, she wont be able to creep on him.
The way to stop her from this is cutting off her resources. Which is you, her friend, and probably school. Talk to her friend about it and tell her that its unhealthy. Try to convince her friend that she needs to help you to make your sister stop. Its creepy and it could potentially be dangerous to her (what if she never stops, gets insanely mad, and goes suicidal again because of this??) Then try talking to her school principal, counselor or whomever. Maybe they can relocate her classes or locker so that way she wont interfere with him?
She also needs to make some new friends. I knew someone like her (has weird obsessions and is on medications for certain things like depression) the key to solving this is making her feel comfortable. She needs comfort, safety, friendship, love. Try spending a night with her and letting her do whatever she wants (minus the creeping) she can pick a movie to watch, or where to go shopping etc. She needs you, her sister, to make her feel loved. Same with your mother. Speak to your mother about this and let her know that you 3 should spend some quality time together to make her feel loved. Also, try to get her involved with other people. Introduce her to a new group of people, people who are true, loyal friends who might help her.
There was this one time that I wasn't feeling to great for about a few months. My mom tried to make me feel better, and one time she bought me airplane tickets to Florida. Spring Break it was just her and I in Palm Beach :) it was amazing. It took my mind off everything and I just had a great quality time with her. Maybe your sister needs a little vacation away from home. It doesn't have to be far, maybe just a road trip and sight seeing?
Good luck and inbox me if you have more questions! :)
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