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Can't stand him
So I have this friend. He is gay. We share a lot of laughs, a lot of tears, and we've been through a lot with each other. He's funny and a really cool person, but sometimes he gets on my nerves.
I used to shake it off, but now it is unbearable. He's depressed but pushes away my advice. He sulks and cries over breakups when he has guys all over him. He's naggy, dramatic, rude, and spoiled. My family was cleaning the house today and he sat around doing nothing. He didn't offer any help. I find him very disrespectful lately. He causes a lot of drama, too. He posts it on facebook and tries to get me in between it. I just can't stand him lately. He's my best friend, but I walk on glass to please him when he never does it for me. I am done tolerating his rude behavior. My family can't stand him, either.
Today he got mad because I was on the phone with the guy he hooked me up with. He said I was rude but earlier he said he didn't care how long I talked on the phone. He starts crap and he lies about his life. He said he was super rich and I went to his house once and it was just a tiny little shack. I'm so tired of his selfishness. I can't ever make him happy. He complains that he's fat and ugly and I tell him different and he always accuses me of lying. I just want to end the friendship, but somehow I know I will miss him if I do. I get so irritated.
Any advice?
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Since he is gay, he is hard to get along with. Gay people tend to have mood swings because people make fun if them for being what they are. Usually gay people can't stand up for themselves. What I think your friends problem could be is that he is being told by his parents that being gay is not good, and/or, he could have some problems standing up for himself. So what he is going through now could just be him showing people he knows will not get mad at him that he can stand up for himself. I think your gay friend really needs you to be his friend. Since you are his friend you should talk to him and ask him why he is behaving like this. For a proper answer you should email exactly what his character was before and how it is now. For any more advice please email me on AskAliceMadisson@hotmail.com, if you want to know more about me please go to my temporary website www.AskAliceMadisson.webstarts.com. I give professional advice
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Let me ask you first, do you really want to end this friendship? I know you walked on broken glass just to please him and make him happy but then do you remember the times where in you had so much fun and you just wanted to remember it for the rest of your life? Remember when there wasn't any problems between you two and you were just messing around? Remember the time when you first cried on him and he first cried on you? remember the need for each other? remember going through a lot and still ending up as best friends? Remember seeing each others imperfections but still accept each other? Remember the feeling where he was like the only person you could run to or trust?
Remember those moments. Are you ready to give that up for this mistake/ wrong thing he made? Are you ready to give up everything after what you both have been through?
Let me share to you what is currently happening to me and my best friend. She and her boy friend wouldn't be allowed to date if it was only the two of them so I offered my family's coffee shop which was below our apartment room so that they could hang out there with some of my supervision. I never actually thought she would go to extremes without thinking.
She and her boy friend were French kissing non stop and our coffee shop was an open are so almost everyone could see it and there was a camera. And she didn't even consider what people would think of her or what would the people think of me. The guard saw , the staff saw, the waiter saw, the owner of the apartment saw and even my dad of all people saw them doing it. I never expected her to do that because she was still an innocent girl and she was very fragile and I've known her for so long that I didn't expect this kind of action from her. I'm sorry I'm sharing this to you but it also make me thinks if I should just end our friendship together. But then I remembered the old her together with all the memories. With all the things we've been through. If we survive this we will be stronger than ever.
You see, these are just challenges in life that tries to teach us a lesson from our mistakes. My mistake was leaving them alone and not reminding her what to be careful of. She told me that the guy was the one who made the first move and they just did it and she didn't why she didn't stop. She apologized several times. And right now I don't really know what to do.
But the main point here is that you shouldn't give up your friendship for what he has become or what he has done. You should talk to him, have a talk with your best friend and tell him what you feel, try to share to him what has been your experience being his friend.
You've been through so much together and I believe you shouldn't end this friendship and instead try to survive through this obstacle and your friendship will be stronger than ever.
xoxo
Juliet
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