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I don't like texting my boyfriend...
Well, me and my boyfriend have been dating for about a month now (I know that's not that long) and we are both in high school. Well, it seems in the beginning of our relationship he always put forth a bit of effort into keeping conversation going. But now he just seems not too..
He usually texts me first in the morning and we text until we get to school. And then after school he immediately texts me so I don't think it's because he doesn't want to talk to me..
But even then he just doesn't keep a conversation going and has really short responses and it's boring. I've said before "You start a conversation now" and "You sure can't keep a conversation going(:" but he just says something like "I am preoccupied"..
So usually if I just get tired of starting conversations that he doesn't carry on I'll stop texting him. & depending on the time of day he'll text me a few hours later.
I can't stand it. I don't want to break up with him AT ALL! And I don't want him to get annoyed with me. Usually, I only text people when I have something to tell them not just to say "hey". But I think I should because he's my boyfriend.
So what can I do? What can I say to him and not make him mad? What can I say to keep conversation going? How much is too much texting? Should I just not reply?
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communication in a relationship is very important. it will let you and your boyfriend know how each other feel. texting isn't true communication because you can't tell if a person is faking happiness or if they are upset with you. you can text someone and say "im fine :)" but if you were communicating in person and you said that he could tell by your voice. tell him that you want to have more time together when what you have. although its early in the relationship this is where things start. tell him how you feel and if he cares for you he will understand and you can both try and work something out. hope i helped. oh .. ask him if he wants to hang out sometime. he could be shy..
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You should keep on texting him when you have something to say - that includes just thinking nice thoughts of him.
You should stop demanding answers, or expecting responses to trival questions or passive agressive demands like "You start a conversation now.". If he doesn't response to "Are we good to meet at 7pm still?" then he is being rude. If he doesn't respond to "Hey what you are you thinking?" then he is occupied and that is a stupid text message.
You need to start having the communication you both want to have, and stop having the one you think you should have. It's normal for things to be less instense then they were. There is nothing wrong with that - it all depends on how you handle the changes togeather.
The truth is that text messages SUCK. They are awful way to communicate with people you care about. They strip away complexities, limit humour and affection and are very easy to misinterpret.
So I’d suggest you try to reach out to him with a different medium. If you haven't spoken to him in a little while, send text asking to arrange a call when he’s free for 15 minutes. Or send him an e-mail message with a story and some questions for him to get back too.
Also, do what every couple in this day and age SHOULD do and establish your own ‘Texting Rules for Our Relationship’. People think about texts very differently, so I’m always careful to let my partner know how I deal with texts and it saves me a lot of hassle in my relationships. These are sorts of things I tell my partner.
I don’t really like communicating by text message; I prefer e-mail and phone calls.
My job requires me to be away from my cell phone, or have it on silent most of the day.
If a text message doesn’t need an immediate response I will probably leave it till after work to respond.
I generally don’t respond to text messages when I’m out with friends, I think it’s rude. So if it’s not immediately important, I’ll get back to you during a break.
If you NEED to tell me something, call me. I will always pick up the phone for you when I’m able.
You might feel VERY differently than I do, but whatever you feel, tell your boyfriend and ask him how he feels about texts, and hash out some compromises. It’ll spare you some of this confusion and drama in the future if you know ‘Of course he won’t get back to me till tonight. He leave his phone when he goes to class.” Or whatever the case may be. Don't rely on your own assumptions or feelings about what SHOULD be the Rules of Texting - doing that is a very good way to cause hurt feelings and confusion.
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