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I have caught him shaking my 1 year old daughter and intenially hurting my son
I have a 4 year old and a 7 year old step son. My in laws live in 3 houses on the same land. So all our holidays have been out there etc its just easier. Well My step son is mean and my mother inlaw wont get him any help. His mother hasnt wanted anything to do with him in a long time years. My husband was 17 was he was born and unable to raise him. So my inlaws have full gaurdian ship of him. I would like to take them to court and raise him our self which could cause alot of problems but unable to have the money to get a lawyer right now. I cant leave either of my kids alone with i have caught him shaking my 1 year old daughter hurting my son punching him. hitting intenially hurting him yelling at him telling his he cant stay the night but your sister can. i mean this is constant as soon as my son gets out of the car hes on his case. its hard to talk to my husband about his son i feel like i hate him even though id do anything for him. hes just so awful to my kids. i dont want to go to there house we are down to going out there 1 time a week. sometimes less.
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You don't need a lawyer,all you need is a restraining order! or better yet, get on the phone now and call 911! This is child abuse and if you are aware of him abusing the children and you are not doing anything about other than crying to us about how you love him, then you are just as guilty as he is!You might as well take the damn stick and start beating them with it yourself. If you care about your kids half as much as you claim, you'll have his ass arrested and get him the hell out of your lives. Grow a pair and get this taken care of now!!
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Then you should learn how to write because the way I read it , it made it sound like your husband was abusing the kids, and why would you want to have custody of an abusive kid anyways? why put your kids through this? You don't need advice, you need a shrink!
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You have caught your stepson abusing your kids and yet you want him in your home? No, don't do that. I understand your thinking. You want to provide him with some stability, thinking that will calm him down, but I'm afraid, at his age, the damage has been done. Simply moving him to your home won't do. Then you are looking at a clearly angry and disturbed little boy who is now around your own small, defenseless children day and night (do you plan to sleep with your children every night to make sure he doesn't do anything crazy while everyone is sleeping?). Try talking to your husband in terms of your own children, instead of his son. You could say "Honey, I'm worried about little katy and billy... their brother seems to be hurting them more than playing with them and I'm worried for their safety. How do you think we should handle this?" Surely he must see there is a problem here. I'm betting your stepson is dealing with some pretty intense emotions related to the fact that his own parents didn't want to raise him and yet his father has started a new family with someone else, and is now raising two new children. I'm sure for a 7 year old it is all very confusing and hurtful and he is acting out. If you can't afford a lawyer then I'm guessing you can't afford a therapist either. But somebody has to do something now, before this boy's problems get more out of control. I'm willing to bet he is having big problems at school, too. If you can, ask your husband to consider meeting with the teacher/principal and your in-laws to figure out if the school has any resources that can help him. Be sure your husband knows that you care for his son, and you want him to be close with his siblings, that you are not being mean or jealous.. you just want peace in your family and you want a good life for your stepson also. And I believe you do. I don't think you really hate him... but you are scared of him, and you should be. So until your in-laws or husband are willing to take control of the situation and get him some help, you need to do what you can to limit contact between him and your children. Remember, as a mother, your first priority is to keep your children safe, and they are not safe around your stepson right now. And as he gets bigger, it will only get worse, unless he gets help. Good luck.
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