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my friend thiks she is ugly what do i do?
my friend thinks she is really ugly and fat and worthless but she isnt she is really pretty but maybe a little over weight but she is not ugly and she said she feels this way everyday and i don't know what to do about her because every time i tell her she isnt one of those things she gets mad at me and its ruining our friendship. sometimes i think she likes all these boys and makes-out with them just to feel pretty and she always gets her heart broken after they leave her. she has lots of friends who think she is really pretty but she never listens to us i just really need help with her because i love her(as a friend) and she is one of my best friends.
p.s. she is 14 and she also cuts. i am also 14 and i am a girl.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Sadly, there's not much you can do to help your friend realize the good within her. She is going to believe what she wants to believe no matter what she is told. But, keep in mind that just because she won't believe you, it doesn't mean you should stop telling her how wonderful she is. People really need to hear these types of things, especially people with low self-esteem.
Tell her everyday that she is beautiful, smart, funny, nice, etc. Let her know all of her wonderful qualities. She may not believe you now, but I'm sure she will believe you eventually.
Also try to keep in mind that sometimes confidence issues stem from a lot of different things. She may be having a problem at home that you don't know about. Ask her if there's anything going on at home that she wants to talk about. If she decides to open up, just be there for her. Listen to what she's saying and comfort her the best way you can.
As for her cutting, you need to tell an adult about that one. Cutting is a horrible thing to do (trust me, I cut for 5 years, and still battle with it to this day) and it's not healthy. It can only make you feel better for a split second, but the problems are still there after everything is said & done. I suggest you talk to her parents, or maybe a teacher at school. They will get her the help she needs. She may be mad at you for telling on her, but eventually she will realize that you were right to get her help.
Just be there for her. She really needs a friend, and you're being an excellent one by consoling her when she needs you the most. Continue what you're doing. She's a lucky girl to have someone like you as her friend.
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Some girls have major self-esteem issues, and sometimes friends can't do much to help. You're being a good friend by being there for her, but honestly, some girls always make negative comments about themselves in order to get attention from other people. Tell her she's great the way she is and everyone sees it. Don't let her yell at you when you're trying to be nice, just yell at her and tell her to stop. Cutting does not resolve ANYTHING and it leaves scars. I do not see the point in that. If nothing works, your friend needs to get professional help.
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