|
i dont know what to do about my boyfriend!
i am a 20 year old female that is in love with my highschool sweetheart and when i met hiim he was the sweet shy guy and even though we are 3 years apart we are still together after 7 years. unfortunatly all we do is fight. and it is over stupid stuff he tells me all the time "i love you to death but god you drive me insane and sometimes i really hate you" it makes me feel ugly and not worthy of anything. i completley ignore the words "i love you" when after that he tells me he hates me. :( HELP!!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Sometimes when you love someone so much, there are certain things about you that you have to change inorder to please this person or satisfy this person. Ofcourse in reality, you should never change who you are for anyone, but sometimes you find yourself obliged, or you do it out of love, like when you sacrifice something you really love to do, or your career, or whatever it is, to be with the person you love. So in your case, maybe there is a certain thing about you or about him, in the personality, or a certain action or behaviour that triggers the fighting, usually there is a source which the reason behind the continuous fighting and tension and that lets you get on each others' nerves. So try to find that, and maybe change it. And if there isn't anything, then try to follow a different strategy, try to not fight back when he fights, and like smile or laugh out loud, not in a way to piss him more, but to just laugh it off, you know how you laugh something off, to make it seem of a lesser problem than it really is? Do that. Or like reply back in a low tone and quiet tone, to make him realize how bad and foolish he looks like shouting out at you, so he'll lower his tone. Or simply tell him, I don't want to fight anymore, and just like you know, kiss him or hug him, or talk sweet talk to him, because in the very end, I'm sure that he loves you, and that you love him, and you've been through alot together, so don't throw that away, I don't want to have to tell you to throw that away, because beneath all that fighting, it means so much to you, and to him, so don't lose it, fight for it.
]
I don't know why, but I feel like this kind of reminds me of my ex-boyfriend. He was a verbal abuser. I think what you should do, is talk to him. Tell him he's hurting you. That you don't like it when he says, "i hate you" and "you drive me insane." If he really did love you, then he would consider your feelings instead of saying it out of anger. He should be able to control his rage and fix up his attitude and change. It may take a while, depending on anybody at all. It may be days, a couple of weeks, months, who knows?
If you already did, and he's continuing to do it. Sorry sweetie, then I think it's time for you to move on! And get someone who will appreciate you more, and is able to be a MAN and change FOR you. Someone who will not say such horrible things.
Hard for you to hear, but it's true. I hate seeing people go through the same things as I did... Best of luck! <3
]
More Questions: |