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This girl is a nightmare
I am a female graduate student, in a program where the vast majority of students are female. Last year, I met one of my classmates, who I thought was a nice person, only to find out she is mentally unstable and a total nightmare. Long story short, she is manipulative, controlling, obsessive, paranoid, insanely perfectionistic, a pathological liar, and highly insecure. She comes across as very sweet, but what people don't see, is that she is the total opposite in reality. If you do one tiny, miniscule little thing to get on her bad side, she will literally give you hell.
I lived with her for several months, during which time, I inevitably got on her bad side. She did not talk to me, pretended to be nice (nauseatingly so) to me in front of other people, broke one of my things, hid her silverware and the kitchen trash can in her room, literally hoarded her groceries in her room, accused me of stealing her mail, lied to the landlord about me...Well, I finally left, and it's the best decision I made all year.
But, I can't stop thinking about her. I used to be friends with a couple of girls, who she got to side with her, so now, things are just not the same. Everyone adores her, but no body knows her, and it pains me to even think of it. She is literally mentally ill, but she is the total expert at hiding it, and makes everyone else look bad in the process. The thing that kills me, is that she has a throng of people who think she is such a little sweetheart, when in reality, she is a venomous snake, and they just can't see it. But I saw the red flags early on.
Anyway, I think about how much she has hurt and bothered me all the time. I can't stand seeing her in class, and it pains me to see my old friend (who is a nice person), so close to her, and so distant from me. This has negatively impacted my well-being, my studies...it's this constant gray cloud. Any thoughts and advice are greatly appreciated.
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I'm aware that there pains in this life other than the go-hard pains in the ass, however, as long as people "like" the girl you're describing has opportunity to "disturb" you... they will.
Since you are no longer friend nor roomies, let her "mental and personality issues" stay where they belong. With HER.
The "effects" of people are more intense than their bites. BUT if you are "available" to let them hinder you more than possibly "necessary"... then some of it your fault... She wanted to leave a lasting impression with you. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. Now you have alternatives, but they may not completely disable your negative "response" feelings but they may slightly alleviate them.
Life progresses in the most peculiar ways. Friends becoming foes are apart of that process. I'm not sure what your current outlets of relief/release are but remember that those peticular people really can't live proper full life when there is too much joy or happpiness around them cuz they may be without it on the inside.
"GRAY" clouds... definitely have a silver lining... you just may not want to scream it from the roof of the tallest building per say...
But ah... yea.. Moving forward may not be an easier task... but it is inevitable...
Feel Better
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Hello!
Well you can't do much to make people realize that you are the better person of the two. But heres some advice.
You can't do much so just try your best. You are done with her, you aren't in her nightmare anymore, you aren't living with her anymore, so just find new people. I'm sure not everyone likes her or thinks she is all that great.
Try talking to people. Don't spread rumors or anything, just tell them what she did to you and who she is, because fake people are not appreciated even in college.
Try to talk to the friend that is super close to her but so distant from you. I know how you feel when that happens, numourosly to me as well. If she doesn't realize what she is doing to you, then you don't need her. You sound like a great and wonderful person, don't let people walk all over you.
Good luck.
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