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How do you know if you're ugly or just average?

Question Posted Tuesday November 23 2010, 8:04 pm

Ever since I was little my family has called me "pretty" and all those warm and fuzzy words, but that's just family. I don't take them seriously.

I've never been asked out, always been rejected when I've done the asking... To my knowledge, no guy has ever liked me. (To be hoenst though, I'm not bitter about it, so no need for sympathy)

So... how do you know if you're "ugly"? :/ Do guys look at ugly girls? I ask that 'cause I've noticed lately that, from guys in general, I've been getting more looks. Seriously, just within the past two weeks. I have no rumors floating around me, not lost any weight or done anything drastic to change myself. I checked in a mirror and nothing was on my face or anything... So what's up with that, with guys looking?

One of my guy friends, while he thought I wasn't listening, labled me as "alright", so I guess that means I'm not HIDEOUS.

I know I'm not pretty, if I was I'd know that by now, but perhaps I'm a bit closer to average than I thought?

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lovealways1221 answered Friday November 26 2010, 12:29 pm:
here's a thought... who cares what other people think of you..??

seriously.. if they don't like you or don't like the way you look, they should get on with their lives.

i'm not going to answer your question and tell you if you're pretty or not. because this is ridiculous. give me a rating of 1 for this answer, i dont care. but you REALLY need to understand that you can't please everybody.

so what if people think you're ugly? say it back to them! "you're ugly too!" i'm so sick and tired of hearing girls complain how they aren't pretty enough or they can't get popular because of their looks or a guy hasn't talked to them yet so that must mean their ugly.

GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE! if people don't like the way you look, tell them to look the other way then! if they dont like the way you dress, tell them to f*** off because its none of their business

i'm sorry for being so harsh.. but you have got to realize that you can't please everybody in this world. there's always going to be people who think you're less than them, or think they're better than you. you just have to learn how to shake it off and KNOW you're better than them. why do you have to prove it? why do you even care what other people think??

honestly, you're just wasting your time thinking about "looks". we were born this way for a reason. get used to it. there's girls out there who hate their body and will do everything and anything to hide it or change it. plastic surgery, tattoos, laser surgery blah blah blah. but you know what? they can't stand in the mirror and say 'this is me' because its not who they are.

be proud of who you are. if someone doesn't like it, screw them. who cares???

i had a similar experience. when i was in middle school/beginnning of high school, i was soooo self-conscious. always caring about how i looked, always fixing my hair to impress someone, trying to buy clothes that were popular.. but then i realized, why does it matter? in a few years i'll be out of this town and living life. MY LIFE. why would i try to impress people if i'm not going to see them in 3 years? what's the point? its soo hard to please everyone and try to be perfect. then i realized.. i like being imperfect. i like the fact that i can get ready for school in 20 minutes. i like the fact that i dont wear eyeliner because then i can rub my eyes without worrying about smearing everything and then taking it off every day. i like the fact that i dress differently then other girls. i like myself for who i am. then i made a promise to myself that the rest of my high school career i wouldn't give a damn about what other people thought of me. to be honest, nobody really cares.. i wore a really expensive thing to school to show it off and didnt get any compliments.. then i wore sweatshirt the next day and friends started to talk about the sweatshirt and where i got it.

so please. please. please.. do not change yourself just so you can please other people. because in the end, you'll only be disappointing yourself.. do what makes YOU happy. don't care what other people think. you'll learn eventually that there are people in the world you just have to laugh at their face, ignore them, and walk away with pride.


[ lovealways1221's advice column | Ask lovealways1221 A Question

solidadvice4teens answered Wednesday November 24 2010, 11:07 pm:
You know what you're the only one who thinks you're ugly. You have to deal with your own false sense of self. That can be done with a good counsellor as your self-esteem appears to be in the toilet and that's wrong.

Believe it or not those guys actually dig you and want you to notice them back. I'm sure once you do someone will ask you out. In the past when you did the asking it likely meant they weren't the right person. Unfortunately, that led you to give up on yourself.

You never were ugly and you only think that of yourself. There seems to be a lot of guys interested in you who don't see you as ugly.

My recommendation is to just be you and accept your body and your looks. Beauty is more than skin deep and to the people sending signals you're pretty to them and they want to know you.

So, let's drop this "I'm ugly" point of view, work on your self-esteem and start showing interest in these guys. The past is the past and nobody is doing any judging or rejecting anymore. Chalk that up to isolated experiences and move on.

[ solidadvice4teens's advice column | Ask solidadvice4teens A Question

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