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Am I the one that's "crazy" in this?
So this guy and I broke up and I still wanted him, but I guess he decided to just make me feel like he still wanted me instead of actually getting back together. I’ve been talking to him still and he’ll say things like “I’m waiting for you to be ready” and “I don’t want anybody but you” blah blah blah and calling and texting me saying he wants to see me. Well come to find out, he’s had a girlfriend this whole time. I found out from myspace, and I haven’t been on myspace in so long it’s so random that’s how I found out. I went to his profile and he had pictures of her everywhere. I almost threw up; I got that sick feeling you get when you realize you’ve just been deceived. Possibly even cheated on while you were with the person, but you don’t know for sure. And I couldn’t believe it. I just sat there with a stupid look on my face like how did I fall for that and why did I fall for him out of all people, I’m so stupid. The initial feeling was shock, which turned to a little bit of jealousy, and then it turned into hurt, pain and anguish. I held it in for as long as I could and I couldn’t help it anymore. I broke down and wept. My thoughts went back to everything I’d ever told him. I said I loved him, and I’ve never said that to a guy so it meant something to me. I told him I wanted him back. I said I wanted to see him too when he’d call me. He said he wouldn’t ever hurt me. I have horrible trust issues, but I let my guard down with him because I believed him. Coming to the realization that our relationship was nothing is extremely difficult. Cheating, lying and deception are pretty much among the worst things you can do to someone. It’s SO painful. Especially when the feelings are real. I’ve never been so hurt by a guy before. How do you move on? Do I just take it day by day? Everyone says to just get over it, but it’s hard. It’s way easier said than done. The logical side of me says it’ll get better with time and I’ll meet someone new and everything will eventually be okay. But the emotional side of me is stuck on it because I’m so hurt. I ended up confronting him about it, and he texted me this morning telling me I’m like everyone else on this planet and that I don’t get him at all. Just talking shit. And I told him I wasn’t mad because he has a new girlfriend (I mean, yeah, I’m jealous), I said I was pissed because he’s been leading me on this whole time he’s been with her. If he would’ve said “hey, I’ve moved on” etc., then it still would’ve hurt, but at least he would’ve been honest about it and I would’ve understood. And I stopped texting him so he said “I can’t love you if I don’t love myself”….. tell me if I’m wrong, but, isn’t that a copout? Like he’s trying to excuse what he did, maybe? I don’t know. But I would really appreciate any insight to my situation. How do I let him go? I’m so heartbroken from this, how do I recover?
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Dear "Am I the one that's "crazy" in this?",
Aww sweetheart no! He played you like a pro and he's STILL trying to play you. I'm sooo sorry that that happened to you. No one deserves that. Break ups basically suck. You do have to take it day by day. For now what I would do is just distance yourself completely from him. Eventually he will probably come around and try to apologize and you guys can be friends but until then don't be involved with him because admit it, you do still have feelings for him but you know it's not right. It's gonna be hard, and it's gonna suck, and you'll think you're over it one day and be sobbing the next. But don't give up hope. On yourself, on boys, on humanity. You might not see the light at the end of the tunnel but take it from someone who's gone through cheating, lying and more... everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay then it's not the end. And it WILL end. I promise :) and please please please don't feel pathetic if it takes a long time. Because it SHOULD take a long time. In the end, you'll come out of this as a stronger better person. You can do it :)
Goodluck!
xoxo
LoLLiPoP
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He is an immature person. Brace yourself. Because what you are feeling will not go away easily. Do not pressure yourself into letting go. Sometimes when we just let things be then we realize what to do. This guy cheated on you and believe me when I say this, you will realize all of a sudden that he is a dumb jackass. There is no 'how' on falling for people. It just happens. And unfortunately, it so happened that you loved an immature person.
All throughout your life you will meet different kinds of guys. You will know from this experience on how you will deal with all the future guys you will meet. And then after you meet someone who can give you the love you deserve, you will look back on this time of your life and vaguely remember this stupid, immature boy.
And you will ask yourself,"Who was he again?"
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