|
In love with someone who has MS should I be with him?
19/f - I just got done working at a boy scout camp for 7 weeks. I went up and left behind a boyfriend who disrespects me, pressured me into everything I've done with him, talks down to me, and tries to keep me "barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen" for a lack of better terms. He doesn't encourage me to follow my dreams, and he had cheated on me with my best friend, months ago. While I was at camp, I met this amazing guy, Dennis, he's 10 years older than me, but he was the first person I've ever met that gave me the sort of attention, care, and respect that I've always wanted, but never knew existed. My female room mate talked me into believing that I deserve more. I made sure my boyfriend knew that I'm serious, and was ready to break up with him. but he promised me change (again). I told him that I'd give him until December to change. However; in a moment of rage, distress and depression, I fell to Dennis as a shoulder to cry on. One thing came to another, and I think I'm in love with him. But we're so different, I'm very religious, don't drink, smoke, etc. he's the polar opposite, he's been to prision, does weed, etc. He has MS, and I had to help him through some horrible symptoms of it, and it scared me to death. On the way home from camp, I got in a terrible accident. Dennis showed up at the hospital for me, while my boyfriend didn't. I just don't know what to do, Dennis is everything I had ever hoped for, and he said he'd give up anything for me, but I want children, and he knows he won't live past 50 with MS, and he'll be in a wheel chair, etc. I don't want to bring children into the world that are going to have to go through the same thing. Long term, it seems like nothing will be worth it. but I feel so bad, because so many women have left him and treated him badly because of his condition. I don't know what to do, on paper we shouldn't be compatable, but he's just everything I've ever wanted, I'm afraid of the future.
Please please help, Sincerely, Long Term Challenged
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You should be with the person that cares about YOU and YOUR well being. Dennis seems like a nice guy, and just because he has MS shouldn't hold you back. It may work out, and it may not, but you never know. It is a very dibilitating disease and after awhile it may become very challenging, but people with MS need love too, it doesn't make them any less of a person because they're sick. In my experience, some of the nicest and most undeserving people are the ones that get stuck with these terrible illnesses. Just know that God has a plan for him no matter what it is, and maybe you're there to help him through it. There's no point in being with someone who doesn't make you feel special, and who doesn't support you, so dump the other guy. I say give Dennis a shot, if it doesnt work out then it doesn't work out, but at least you chose someone who would actually care. Good Luck
]
You do deserve better than the bad boyfriend. No matter what, you deserve better and shouldn't have to put up with that. They won't change and nothing will change in that relationship.
If you love Dennis and he treats you so well, go for it! You can see how it goes and get as much happiness as you can. It will have it's own challenges, but no relationship is easy.
]
I think there is a time where you should think about the present and nothing else. If you believe Dennis will bring you happiness and joy, I see nothing wrong with being with him. Forget the age difference, forget the MS, and forget the ticking clock. Think about how happy you could make him. Do the pros make up for the cons? Whatever you end up doing ake sure it is a decision youve taken time to really think about.
Just remember, everyone has one fault or another. No matter who you settle down with, you'll have to sacrifice something. I'm trying to say that no relationship is perfect.
If you have any other questions, feel free to ask.
]
More Questions: |