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controlling mother
i am a 16 year old female. he is a 16 year old male. okay so on sunday night my boyfriends mom made all these new rules and stuff and i couldn't handle it so i broke up with him. (i regret it and i did not mean it. i said it bc i was pissed.) he went insane that night and i found out the next morning he spent the night in the hospital because he threatened to commit suicide. we hung out that day for 2 hours to talk bout the break up. he said he did not mean it when he said he wanted to commit suicide. he asked his mother if we could hang out longer and she said no. he went insane again and went back to the hospital. i havent heard from his since. i called his cell 3 times yesterday and on the third call, his mom answered. this is our convo.
Me: hey is ****** there?
her: no he is at the hospital, you can't visit him
me: okay well can u have him call me back when he gets out:
her: no, you guys aren't allowed to talk anymore or see each other.
me: ok.
there was a little bit more. but yeah. so now we are not alllowed to see each other or talk ever again. it's hard because he completes me. i am not sure if this is a test to see if our love is really this strong. but i am scared that he is gonna come back and not have any feelings for me anymore. so i don't know what to do at this point. She is controlling him and has the whole relationship. I have talked to a lot of people and all i can do is blame the mother. She makes him uncomfortable which makes me get uncomfortable which then makes him freak out. i really dont know what to do.. please help. i need imput and advice
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I am so sorry you are going through hell with your boyfriend.
Keep in mind, you are both 16, and what seems grand now will change ten fold by the time you reach 30, he will then be a distant memory you look back at from time to time.
If your boyfriend is threatening suicide over break-ups, it would be in your best interest to have nothing to do with him until he gets some help. He is either attemping to control situations through attention grabbing behavior or he has a mental illness, probably bi-polar, or has a personality disorder such as Borderline Personality Disorder.
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Oh my gosh i am so sorry you nearlly lost your boyfriend, that must be horible, talk to his mum and say that she needs to let him have his life, his not a little kid anymore, she needs to let go, see him anyway, do you really think strongly about him does he feel the same about you, if he keeps going insane then get him to see a counciler, he may just need to talk to some one who will listen and give him advice but who wont go and tell everyone, may you should to, and you should definetly get his mum to go and talk to a counciler, she needs to know that he needs to lead his own life! i hope everyy think works out okay and i hope my advice helped! :)
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1st off, let me just say that that really sux. I'm sorry things aren't going too well. You might want to look at this story from some one else's shoes, like the mother's for instance. I'm not sure what her new rules were, but I'm sure she meant the best when she began to enforce them. And when you broke up with him because of her actions I'm sure she took it as badly as a slap in the face. Now that things are over between you and him, she probably wants to protect him from the events that occurred after the break-up. She's just trying to keep her child's safety in mind, although it seems to me like she's making things worse in the process. I think your best chance of making a happy ending for this story is trying to reason with his mom. Try to be as nice as possible, or else she may not waste her time talking to you. There may be alot of restrictions and even more new rules if she lets you see him, but you might not want to compain this time around...
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I think you should call his mother up try and
to explain yourself to her tell her you'd like another chance you regret breaking up with her son and you didn't mean it you made a mistake and overreacted seeing as you were angry people say things they don't mean sometimes especially when their angry it doesn't make sense first she said you could visit him in the hospital then said you two weren't allowed to see or speak to one another she shouldn't of said you could visit him if she was going to not allow you to see him or talk to him like i said it doesn't make sense if you trying to explain herself to her doesn't work then i don't think there's much you can do you've got to respect her wishes and what she wanted she can control him seeing as he's her son and not a stranger things weren't meant to be between you
two you can't make something work that isn't meant
to be everything happens for a reason you can't change what has happened even though you'd probably like to(:
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His mom might be an evil bitch, but you should still respect her rules.
Her son is unbalanced. It's too bad she makes him uncomfortble, but she's still the parent of a seriously screwed up teenage boy right at this moment and she has to do the best she can to keep him safe.
And yes, that means keeping the two of you apart. I'd probably make the same call in her position if my son was threatening to take his own life over a break up. He is clearly not capable of being in a relationship, or a even a friendship with you, that is reasonable and balanced.
Leave him alone and back off. This boy needs help you can't give him. Let him get it with the proffesionals. If you are concered his mother is abusive, talk to a counselor at school or a make a report, but otherwise, it's time to back off.
You can love someone and still realize that they are not in a position to be with you right now.
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